


To Build A Home

by i_live_in_the_reylo_moon



Series: Dangerous Woman [2]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Devoted Reylo, Epilogue, F/M, Family, Family Drama, Fluff, Love, Responsibility, Reylo - Freeform, Sequel, Smut, alternative universe, love and smut, snap shots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-08
Updated: 2017-03-10
Packaged: 2018-09-15 21:00:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 21,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9257072
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_live_in_the_reylo_moon/pseuds/i_live_in_the_reylo_moon
Summary: Sequel to Dangerous Woman - please read DW first to know what is going on :DWhat happened in the aftermath of that fateful December 23 night?  Has Kylo become Ben?  Has Rey really moved past the lies?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for all the love and feedback for Dangerous Woman. It was incredible and to know that so many of you wanted to see the story continue was delightful and who am I to say no? lol So here it is the sequel/epilogue to Dangerous Woman.
> 
> I hope you enjoy it :D

o-o-o-o-o

Ben looks down at the tiny naked sleeping body nestled against his chest and simply can’t believe his luck. A broad, proud smile crosses his lips as his eyes flit up.

Rey is watching him with complete and utter adoration from the hospital bed. Her hair is a mess with wisps all over the place and her furious red flush has settled into a healthy glow.

‘We need to name him you know.’ Rey murmurs into the contented silence, the only other sound coming from the hum of the machines dotted around the room.

‘I know.’ He whispers, his eyes falling back to his son, with a besotted love in his eyes.

‘What about Han?’

Ben chuckles and their newborn squirms beneath the t-shirt he’s snuggled beneath.

‘I don’t think he likes that one.’ Ben smiles and Rey rolls her eyes.

‘Well what do you suggest?’ Rey fires him an expectant look.

‘What about Benson?’ Ben quirks his eyebrows and gives her a teasing wink.

‘No chance. No way is my son being called Benson Solo. Try again.’ Rey snickers as she looks over at man and child.

Ben hums for a long moment before a small smile appears on his lips and it peaks Rey’s interest in a heartbeat.

‘Jacen. J-A-C-E-N. Jacen.’ Ben states looking between Rey and their son.

‘Jacen? Jacen Solo.’ Rey says the name out loud, letting it roll around her mouth and mind.

Ben looks at her expectantly as he gently brushes his thumb over their newborn’s back.

‘You know I quite like it. Jacen Solo.’ Rey lets a smile develop on her lips as she sees their son wriggle a little against his Father’s broad chest.

‘I think he likes it too, eh? Jacen, is that your name?’ Ben coos as he gazes down at his son.

The tiny tot makes a tiny mewling sound and Ben’s smile widens as he looks up at Rey excitedly.

‘I think we’ve got our name.’

‘So what made you think of Jacen?’ Rey enquires, wanting to know more about the name she is giving her son.

‘It’s a variant of the name Jason which means healer in Greek. And I think our little man healed a few things, don’t you?’ Ben smiles softly, wistfully looking between their son and his girlfriend.

But Rey sees a flicker of doubt in his eyes and she can’t help but feel concerned that he still feels unsure. So in an effort to make him realize just how much she loves him, she’s about to do something she knows he wouldn’t be expecting.

‘You know there is one problem.’ She poses, trying to hide her knowing and excited grin.

‘With what?’ Ben asks alarmed, his brows furrowed as he continues to gently stroke Jacen’s back.

‘The name.’

‘Why? What’s wrong with it? I thought you liked it?’ Ben panics, worry clear on his face as he holds Jacen protectively.

‘I do. I really do. But you’re Ben Solo and he’s Jacen Solo. But I’m not a Solo.’ Rey tells him, looking at him expectantly, but Ben just looks at her with confusion.

Rey huffs, shaking her head when she realizes he’s not getting it.

‘Ben Solo will you marry me?’ Rey asks, her eyes smiling along with her face.

Ben’s eyes widen and his mouth falls open in shock and surprise.

‘Say that again?’

‘Ben Solo, will you marry me?’ Rey bites her lips together as she stares at her boyfriend and their son.

‘Yes. Of course I’ll marry you.’ Ben answers with a broad grin as he rises effortlessly to his feet and leans over, pressing a kiss to his fiancée’s lips, while cradling their son in his large hands.

Rey reaches up and brushes her fingers over the dark hair on Jacen’s head as she looks up adoringly at Ben.

‘I love you, the future Mrs. Solo.’ Ben murmurs, as he holds her gaze.

‘And I love you baby daddy.’ Rey replies cheekily, and it earns her a chuckle before another peck on the lips, before Ben straightens up.

Jacen wriggles inside Ben’s t-shirt, his little hands balled into fists and his legs kicking as he grizzles. Rey reaches up for her son and Ben slowly and very carefully removes his boy from inside his clothes. He presses a tender and loving kiss to Jacen’s temple before laying him in Rey’s arms.

Ben sits back down in the chair, as a nurse steps into the room and smiles over at the little family. Rey pulls her loose t-shirt up and Jacen instinctively latches onto her nipple. It’s an odd sensation feeding her son, but she knows it’ll take a little getting used to.

But then her face flushes at a memory from when she first met her son’s Father. Their first night together when Ben made her orgasm from nipple stimulation alone. Rey shifts in bed and her eyes wander to her future husband’s face, and she sees he’s sporting a knowing look.

He goes to say something but Rey shakes her head in warning, her eyes looking at the nurse. Ben smirks as he pushes his glasses further up his nose and crosses his arms over his chest. Rey sighs contentedly, gazing back down at her nursing baby.

‘You know I was going to propose to you. Last year.’ Ben announces and Rey’s head snaps round to look at him and he gives her a wistful smile.

‘I had it all planned. Even got you a ring. I was going to put it in your stocking and get you to open the presents shortly before midnight. And the engagement ring would be the last thing you’d open, and then I was going to ask you to marry me.’ Ben looks at her, his eyes tinged with sadness at the memory of what happened a year ago.

‘Ben.’ Rey murmurs and he offers her a half smile.

‘And now you’ve gone and stole my thunder.’ Ben chuckles as he digs his hand into the pocket of his coat on the back of the chair.

‘Technically you should be the one giving me the ring, seeing as you asked me. But as you’re a little busy, and you’ve made me the happiest man in the entire galaxy, I think we can go against tradition a little, don’t you?’ Ben smiles as he perches on the edge of the bed.

He lifts the lid off the small turquoise-blue box, seeing as Rey’s hands are full, and takes out the beautiful 2.5 carat Tiffany&Co. diamond platinum engagement ring. Rey’s takes a shaky breath, her eyes flooding with tears.

Ben gently takes her left hand and feels her nervous tremble, and slides the ring on her finger. It’s a little tight and Rey lets out a half giggle, half gasp knowing that it’s down to her baby weight.

‘I can’t wait to make you my wife.’ Ben whispers as he leans over and kisses Rey on the lips, while his hand cups his son’s head, his thumb brushing over his soft dark hair.

The nurse, now standing at the foot of Rey’s bed coughs softly to draw their attention, interrupting their moment.

‘I just need to do some routine checks.’ She tells them and Ben gets off the bed, his eyes fixed on Rey’s blushing face.

‘I’ll be right back, okay?’ He tells her as he grabs his coat and Rey nods, a beaming yet tired smile on her face.

He leans over and kisses Rey on the lips and then the top of Jacen’s head. Ben really can’t believe his luck as he walks backwards toward the door. He steps into the corridor, finally pulling his eyes away from Mother and child.

He makes his way through the hospital – the very one he was rushed to a exactly year before.

Before long he finds himself outside, coat on and pulled tight. He lets out a happy and delighted breath as he looks up at the night sky. It’s snowing. As a snowflake lands on his cheek Ben closes his eyes, and lets his mind drift to memories of the past year.

o-o-o-o-x


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're going back in time peeps!!!! 
> 
> We're going to explore how Ben and Rey ended up becoming parents to Jacen a year on from Dangerous Woman!!!! :D Hope you enjoy??
> 
> Thank you so much for the lovely comments and kudos' given this fic so far - you're all so wonderful :)

o-o-o-o-x

Two days after the shooting

Ben is asleep and Rey is sat on the chair by his bedside, alternating between reading a novel she found in the waiting room and staring at him. He looks peaceful enough, despite the occasional twitch or flicker of his closed eyes and a small grimace on his lips.

There’s a faint knock on the door and it opens slightly before Han’s head appears. His expression is solemn and tense as he looks over at his son.

‘Hey.’ Rey says loud enough for the man to hear and Han looks over at her, his expression only hardening as he steps fully into the hospital room.

‘Are you okay? You look a little tense?’ Rey muses, her brows furrowing as she looks at Han, who in turn stares at the sleeping form of his son.

‘Han? Is everything alright?’ Rey enquires when he doesn’t reply. She rises to her feet and takes a step toward the older man.

‘Oh, I’m fine. Fine.’ Han mutters and this just makes Rey worry more, especially given the way he’s still looking down at his son. He’s looking at Ben with regret.

Seemingly knowing he’s being watched Ben stirs. His eyelids flutter open and for a moment everything is a little blurry with sleep. He turns his head to find his Father and girlfriend watching him.

‘What am I the latest zoo attraction?’ He grumbles sounding sleepy and stretching his neck.

‘It’s Christmas day.’ Rey smiles at him and he returns the gesture, but his eyes move to look beyond her, and beyond Han. He’s looking through the glass window of the double doors.

‘Who are your friends?’ He nods toward the door and Rey turns to look at who he means.

There are four men in black suits, white shirts, black ties with earpieces standing just outside the door – typical protection detail for someone as important as the Director of the Federal Investigation Agency.

‘I’m sorry son.’ Han mumbles and Rey’s head spins to look at him, her face a picture of confusion. Why is Han sorry?

‘Don’t be. I knew it was going to happen.’ Ben sighs and Rey’s confusion only mounts.

‘What? What’s happening? What’s going on?’ She snaps, the panic rising rapidly in her chest.

‘Ben Solo I’m arresting you on charges of fraud, bribery, and conspiracy.’ Han states mournfully, that look of regret becoming clearer on his aged face.

‘What? No, you can’t. You can’t arrest him. You can’t.’ Rey stammers, stunned by what is happening before her very eyes, as Han steps forward and produces a set of handcuffs from the back of his trousers.

‘Is that really necessary?’ Leia cuts, no one noticed her stepping into the room.

‘It’s protocol.’ Han huffs, looking at Ben with a sense of sympathy.

‘Mom it’s fine. It’s fine.’ Ben tells them, as he reaches out for Rey with the hand Han isn’t currently cuffing and attaching to the metal railing of the bed.

Rey can’t fight back or hide the tears that are starting to spill from her dumbfounded eyes. She can’t believe what is happening. She’s just so confused. But she steps over to the bed regardless and Ben grips her hand tightly within his larger one.

‘Rey.’

‘I don’t understand? You helped them. If it wasn’t for you they would have never got Snoke or Hux or brought down First Order News. So why are they arresting you?’ Rey rambles, her pulse racing with fear as she grips his hand tightly with both of hers.

‘Because I still did things that were wrong. I’m still responsible for what I did. I can’t escape from that. I need to own up for the part I played in everything. I need to take responsibility for my actions.’ Ben tells her softly, sounding remarkably coherent for someone who’d just woken up. Not to mention the fact he was shot and had major emergency surgery a couple of days earlier.

‘But you helped them-‘

‘And that will go in Ben’s favour. Don’t worry I will fight for a reduced prison sentence.’ Han states, and Rey’s eyes widen with clear shock and her mouth falls open as the word ‘prison’ spins around inside her mind.

‘Pri-prison? No. No. I can’t loose you. I can’t. Please no.’ Rey sobs, crumbling both internally and externally as she falls hard onto her knees at Ben’s bedside.

Forgetting all about the surgery and gunshot wound, Ben tries desperately to lean over the side of the bed and reach for her. But the pain and the new restraint of handcuffs stop him from going too far and he sinks back with a grimaced hiss.

‘I can’t loose you.’ Rey repeats over and over as she clutches onto his hand, pressing it against her flush cheek that is now slick with tears.

‘Rey.’ Leia’s voice breaks Rey’s mantra as she gently places her hands on Rey’s upper arms and guides her to her feet.

‘Come here.’ Leia whispers as he turns Rey around and pulls her into a motherly hug, one that Rey accepts easily, nestling her head into the older woman’s shoulder.

‘I’m sorry. You know that right?’ Han grumbles, looking between his wife and his son. Leia simply glares disappointedly at her husband.

Ben takes as deep a breath as he can manage, before tearing his eyes off Rey and his mom and nodding.

‘I knew the risks when I agree to being an informant.’ He replies trying to sound calm and assured, but his voice giving away his anguish at the prospect of a prison sentence.

‘We’ll get you the best lawyer money can get.’ Leia says forcefully as she and Rey break apart.

‘Save your money. I’m pleading guilty.’

‘What?’ Rey barks, this day is just getting better and better.

‘I’m guilty. I did those things. I deserve to be punished for what I’ve done.’ Ben points out, but isn’t able to disguise the fear creeping into his voice.

‘We’re still getting you the best lawyer. They can you the best deal they can.’ Leia snaps, folding her arms over her chest and glaring between her son and husband.

‘Don’t you think being shot was punishment enough? Why do you want to go and punish everyone else, huh? What did I do? Why do _I_ deserve to be punished? You going to prison isn’t just a punishment for you, but for me as well.’ Rey snarls, anger and pain etched across her face and burning in her eyes.

‘Rey-‘ Ben starts.

‘Forget it. I don’t want to hear it.’ Rey hisses as she storms out of the hospital room, barging past Han’s team of security and marching down the corridor, hot angry tears rolling from her eyes.

‘Well done the two of you.’ Leia shakes her head and Han looks surprised, even raising his hands as if to say “what-have-I-done?”

‘You could have chosen a better time to arrest him. Not Christmas day. And _you_? Do you not care about that poor girl’s feelings at all?’ Leia growls at her husband first, before turning her attentions to her son.

Both men have the audacity to look sheepish and Leia rolls her eyes before marching her own way out of the hospital room.

‘I suggest you get some rest. You’ve got a long prison sentence ahead of you.’ She fires back at Ben as she turns to look at him, her face the image of disappointed parent.

Ben sighs as he closes his eyes. Han takes this as his cue to leave for the moment.

Has Ben just lost Rey already when he’s only just tentatively got her back?

o-o-o-o-x

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)
> 
> So Ben is facing up to his actions. But what about Rey?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I've decided that this fic will be written like snap shots of the events between Dangerous Woman and chapter one of this fic.

o-o-o-o-o

April

‘I don’t want you to go. Please don’t leave me.’ Rey sniffs, tears spilling from her eyes as she grips Ben’s hand so tightly his bones ache.

‘Buttercup, I have to. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.’ Ben forces a small smile – it’s an attempt at reassurance, but he doesn’t feel it in himself.

Rey takes a staggered breath as she forces her eyes up to met Ben’s. This just makes her cry harder and let out a choked sob. Ben pulls her into his arms, and Rey buries her face into his neck, her tears dampening his skin.

Ben runs his hands up and down her back, pressing a flurry of kisses to the nape of her neck.

‘Shhhh. It’s going to be fine. Okay? We’re going to be fine. I love you so much remember that. When things are hard or sad I want you to remember just how much I love you. And I’ll be out before you know it.’ Ben coos softly in her ear and Rey sniffles, her arms wrapped around his waist.

They stay that way for a while before Rey’s tears dry up and she slowly pulls out of his grip. She looks up at him a little sheepish with embarrassment of being so weak. So weak when it’s him who’s going to prison in the morning, not her. He should be the one needing comfort, needing reassurance, and needing her, not the other way round.

‘Are you okay?’ He asks gently and Rey nods, biting her lips together.

Ben nods as he looks at her, an air of awkwardness falling around them. Since he was shot they’d not been intimate. At first it was because of his injury and recovery, but then it became clear it wasn’t just that. It was the loss of trust following his revelation. Rey couldn’t just sweep aside the lies he’d told her, it wasn’t that easy or that simple. The trust had to be rebuilt.

They shared a bed and kisses and cuddles, but nothing beyond that. And Ben never pressed the issue. Rey will come back to him in her own time.

Rey rises to her feet and extends her hand out toward him. His eyes focus on it before flitting up to her face and he gulps. There’s a look in Rey’s eyes he’s not seen in months. Not since that fateful day. Desire.

He accepts her offered hand and gets to his feet. Rey takes a sharp breath and smiles at him. Ben returns the gesture. But his is more reassuring, he wants to make her as comfortable as possible as she turns to lead him away from the living room of their new, smaller two bedroom apartment.

They’d moved in late January, deciding that their previous apartment was too expensive to live in, given that Ben was unemployed and going to prison and Rey is a student with only a part-time income.

Rey leads Ben to the bedroom, pushing the door close behind him. The room is lit by the moonlight drifting in through the window. She steps over to him and presses her hands to his chest, he can feel her breath on the base of his throat.

‘Rey-‘ He mumbles and she looks up at him.

‘We don’t-‘

Rey shushes him before kissing him. It’s a long and gentle kiss, conveying the emotion she’s feeling over their situation. Her fear, her worry, her sorrow, but ultimately her love. Her love for him.

Ben slowly and somewhat hesitantly places his hands on her waist, as Rey works his lips open. Her tongue tentatively brushes against his lower lip and he can’t help the tiny groan that escapes, it’s been so long.

Rey teasingly bites his lower lip as she pulls back, dragging her teeth over his pouty lip as she looks up to meet his eyes. She sees that his dark eyes are starting to glaze over with his arousal and it gives her butterflies.

Ben’s grip tightens on her waist as he stares hungrily at her, but it’s as if he’s too afraid to move or act. Rey lets out a gasping breath, her mouth falling open slightly and it’s enough for Ben. Now he acts.

He crashes his lips against hers in a hungry and fierce kiss. His hands move from her waist to cup her jaw, as she grips his elbows to keep her balance. Her heart is pounding loudly in her chest, and her legs are feeling increasingly weak.

It had been so long since she’d let herself feel, trying to keep some boundaries while she dealt with his betrayal, and then of course the reality that she will be loosing him for a while.

At times it felt like she was shunning intimacy in order to prepare herself for the months ahead, but now with his lips on hers and his hands gripping her jaw, she realizes that she was just punishing herself.

Rey pulls back a little, but she can feel Ben’s panting breath against her mouth.

‘Ben.’ She purrs, her hands moving to his chest and her fingers curling into his black shirt.

He presses his forehead against hers and closes his eyes, simply taking a moment, letting her make the decisions of where this should go. With slightly trembling fingers Rey begins to undo the buttons.

With the first one undone Ben’s eyes fire open and he stares deeply into her hazel eyes that are cast in shadow.

‘Rey, are you, are you sure?’ He rasps and she nods, feeling surer than ever.

Accepting her assurance Ben drops his hands to his sides, letting things to progress at Rey’s pace, not wanting to push her. So she continues to pop open the buttons, pushing the material aside and letting her fingers graze over Ben’s pale skin.

She pauses when she is level to where she knows the jagged gunshot wound is, her breath caught in the back of her throat. Her eyes flit up to Ben’s face, and she sees that he’s chewing nervously on his bottom lip. It’ll be the first time she’s really looked at or touched the scar. She’d seen it before, but not this up close and personal.

Her heart is hammering as she undoes the button level with the scar, and slowly pushes the cotton material aside, revealing the healed skin. Even in the dim moonlight she can see the rough red skin. Her fingers drift over to it, and she cautiously runs the tips of her slightly trembling fingers over it. Ben inhales a fraction and Rey jerks her hand away.

‘Hey, it’s okay.’ Ben mumbles lowly, a faint smile on his lips in reassurance.

Rey takes a deep breath before tracing her fingers across his abdomen, while undoing the remaining buttons with her free hand. Once all buttons are undone and his shirt is gaping open she bites on the corner of her bottom lip, admiring his toned abs.

She can feel a blush creep across her cheeks, especially when her fingers follow the trail of dark hair from his belly button and down. Rey looks up when her fingers pause at the band of his jeans. With their eyes locked together Rey undoes the button and then unzips his fly, her knuckles brushing over the clear bulge in his pants.

Rey bites her lips together as she pushes his jeans open, revealing his tight black boxer briefs. She sinks her hand inside his jeans, dragging her somewhat blunt fingernails over his erection. Ben lets out a prolonged grunt and his cock twitches in reply to her.

It’s too much; it’s much too much. He needs her more now than he’s ever needed or wanted her. He’s just got to have her. He’s practically desperate. He’ll beg if he has to.

‘Rey.’ His voice sounds so husky and raspy, his pupils are blown and he’s had to ball his hands into fists to stop himself from grabbing her.

Rey looks up with such sweet innocence on her face, only to be given away by her smirking lips.

‘Please.’ He chokes, as she almost languidly stokes him through his underwear.

Rey sighs, biting her lips together as she trails her gaze down his torso. Ben goes to say something else when she drops to her knees. Swiftly pulling her hand out of his jeans and instead hooking her fingers into the band of his underwear, and yanking both his boxer briefs and jeans to his knees, freeing his erection to Ben’s clear relief.

Again Ben goes to speak when Rey shuts him up, this time by gripping his cock and pressing a sloppy kiss to the tip. Her eyes fire up to meet his and Ben knows that he’s done for, as he watches her poke her tongue out and lick up the length of him. He groans loudly, sagging against the door and closing his eyes.

Rey smiles to herself as she sinks her mouth onto him, she wants this to be a night to remember, for both of them. She wants him to have this memory to get him through the coming months.

Ben flutters his lids open as he looks down to see Rey sucking him off.

‘Fuck.’ Ben rasps lowly, his head falling back against the door.

His body feels like it’s on fire, all sensations and blood are pooling in his groin and he knows that he won’t last much longer, not after these past few months.

‘Rey…….Rey……I’m……….I’m gonna……….I’m gonna cum.’ Ben pants, his one hand making it’s way into her hair and tugging on one of her three buns.

But Rey doesn’t relent; instead she just takes him deeper in her mouth, her jaw aching and eyes watering. But her discomfort means nothing right now, nothing in comparison to making Ben unravel.

‘Rey…..’ He tries again to get her attention, but she just carries on so he just lets it happen.

As he hits his release with his eyes scrunched close and body trembling Rey swallows his cum down, before sucking him clean. When she leans back on her heels he slowly looks down at her, to see the sweet and innocent smirk on her lips.

Ben slides down the door, crouching in the small gap between it and Rey. He’s pretty sure she’s done it deliberately, but there’s a droplet of cum on the corner of her mouth. He lifts his hand and cups her jaw, wiping the cum from her skin with the pad of his thumb. The entire time their eyes are locked together, and that spark, that electricity pulses between them.

Ben is about to lean forward and kiss her when Rey darts back, away from him. She rises to her feet before stepping back and sitting on the edge of the bed, her legs open. Her heart spikes when she hears the growl that Ben makes as he crawls on all fours across the floor toward her.

He pushes her legs wider apart and rising onto his knees. His fingers teasingly run up the outside of her thighs toward the band of her leggings. With their eyes on one another he peels them over her hips with Rey lifting her butt to help him rid her of the garment. In a blink of an eye they’re discarded somewhere on the floor to the side, but Ben’s left her panties on.

Rey bites her lips together as she watches Ben as he trails hot wet kisses along the inside of her thighs, but avoiding where she’s aching and needs relief. She groans in annoyance and feels his smirk against her skin, but it doesn’t make him move any quicker, in fact he seems to kiss slower.

‘Lie back.’ He whispers, and her stomach knots before she slowly lowers back down onto the bed, her eyes staring up at the recently painted ceiling.

Ben licks a line from her knee to the apex of her hip and Rey’s breath is starting to come out louder as she forces herself to focus on the ceiling. She lets out a loud moan and her toes curl, when she feels the flat of his tongue lick her through her damp panties.

When he does it again her eyes roll into the back of her skull and her hands ball into tight fists at her sides. Ben hooks his fingers into the band of her panties and all but rips them off her, making her gasp in surprise.

But her panties are quickly replaced by Ben’s mouth, hot, warm and hungry on her folds. His tongue parting them with steady licks as the tip of his nose rubs against her swollen clit. Rey’s now panting, her mouth hanging open and her chest heaving as Ben pins her hips down, to still her bucking hips.

It doesn’t take long, especially not when Ben pushes not one but two long fingers inside her, and starts to thrust them in and out while doing a beckoning gesture for Rey to crumble and come undone in a shaking yelp of his name.

Rey is gasping for breath, her eyes close as Ben crawls up her body, pressing languid kisses on her skin as he pushes up her loose fitting sweater. He pauses when he reaches her breasts, both hands gripping the sweater and staring down at her small but adequate offering.

Rey’s eyes crack open in time to watch Ben swoop down and greedily kiss her one nipple. The feeling of his lips encasing the sensitive and erect bud, his teeth brushing over her skin and his tongue flicking it makes her arching up off her bed and grip his shoulders with her hands.

Ben gently nips her nipple before unlatching his lips and doing the same to her other nipple. Rey can feel her arousal starting to build rapidly in her core, so soon after her release, but then her brain supplies a memory of their first night together when he gave her her first ever penetrative orgasm and her first multiple.

But she’s not alone in being aroused, the feel of Ben’s erection against her pubic bone as he kisses a trail up her chest and neck, while peeling off her sweater tells her he’s ready, willing and able again already.

‘How do you want to do this?’ Ben rasps as he kisses along her jaw.

‘Cowgirl.’ Is all Rey croaks before Ben is on his feet, looming over her.

Rey takes a long moment to admire him. Standing there all broad and imposing, his shirt gaping open, his underwear and jeans bunched above his knees and his cock standing to attention.

He goes to take off his shirt, but Rey doesn’t want him too, ‘Stop.’ She instructs and he shirks the shirt back over his shoulders.

Rey takes a contented long breath as Ben walk around the bed and climbs on. She rises up onto her elbows, looking over her shoulder and watching as he settles down on the bed, his head against the pillows and his eyes fixed on her.

She turns and crawls over him, settling her knees either side of his hips. But rather than just sink down onto him and ride him till she can’t take anymore she simply runs her hands over his torso, her fingers lightly brushing over his scars.

‘Rey-‘ He mumbles, his abdomen flexing with tension beneath her fingertips.

Rey stops, her eyes narrowing on his flush face with pouty pink lips and wide expression eyes. He looks back at her and she sees what looks like a plea in his dark eyes.

And who is she to deny him his plea. So she shuffles forward a fraction, Ben’s hands settling on her hips as she rises up, grips his cock in her hand and slowly lowers down onto him. Rey lets out a moany breath as she takes his full length, her eyes crinkling at the corners with a little flicker of pain as she’s stretched to accommodate his size.

Once full to the hilt she gives herself a long moment, to just feel him inside of her. It’s a feeling like no other, and she doesn’t even try to stop the blushing grin from forming on her face. Ben looks up at her quizzically.

‘You okay?’ He rasps, impossibly low and husky.

‘Hm.’ She smiles down at him, and his brows furrow, but he doesn’t press her. Instead he gives her hips a little squeeze and Rey rises up before sliding back down.

She rides him, slow at first but then he bucks up into her, urging her to increase her pace and so she does. Jerking her hips up and down, back and forth and a few stunted figures of eight. Ben sits up and Rey wraps her arms around his neck, pulling him in for a long and loving kiss as she grinds against him.

‘Fuck.’ Rey grunts as Ben slips his hands between their bodies and rubs her clit slowly with his thumb.

Now with the added stimulation Rey is teetering on the brink of her second release and her hip movements are becoming erratic. Ben is breathing hard as he thumb begins to move quicker, needing to get her off before he climaxes himself.

‘Cum for me buttercup.’ He pants, his breath hot against her lips and its all Rey needs to push her over the edge.

‘Fuck Kylo, yes. Yes.’ Rey groans, forgetting herself and seemingly forgetting who Ben is. But he doesn’t mind as he jerks up into her, hitting his release with a low grunt, their foreheads pressed together and breath mingling.

o-o-o-o-o

The next morning Rey wakes up to an empty bed and a note:

Rey

This is not goodbye it’s see you soon.

I love you. Remember that.

Ben xx

She sobs as she curls up into a ball while clutching the note to her chest. Ben has reported to prison without saying goodbye.

o-o-o-o-o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)
> 
> Hope it was okay - I can't believe I wrote 3k on a smut chapter!!! Just hope it wasn't too cringeworthy :s Was it awful???
> 
> Let me know your thoughts :D


	4. Chapter 4

o-o-o-o-o

May

Rey slams her hand hard against the side of the printer, letting a slight growl escape from her lips. She’s not in the mood for the printer to be playing up, not today. Not when she’s due to see Ben this afternoon and she’s on a deadline, needing to print her written assignment for class.

‘For fucks sake.’ She snaps when the paper gets chewed in the inner workings of the printer yet again.

‘You okay there?’ A voice that was once so familiar comes from behind her, and she freezes, her nostrils flaring a little as she slowly inhales.

‘Fine.’ She hisses, but Finn steps closer and Rey bristles.

She’d not been feeling very well all morning. When she got up she’d had to rush to the toilet to be sick, and she has a headache that just doesn’t seem to want to let up. But there is absolutely no way she’s going to let a bout of illness stop her from seeing Ben. No chance.

‘Let me take a look.’ Finn offers and Rey scowls, huffing loudly but she takes a single step to the side, giving him room.

Finn opens the panel and retrieves the jammed paper with a happy yet slightly cautious smile on his lips as he glances up at his ex.

‘You don’t look too good. Are you alright?’ Finn enquires with narrow and concerned eyes, as he leans in a little closer while the printer prints her document.

‘I told you I’m fine.’ Rey barks, snatching her printing from the tray and spinning on her heels, but then everything spins on it’s axis and Rey staggers.

But Finn is quick, grabbing her hips and holding her against his body as Poe comes dashing over, concern in his brown eyes.

‘Come on sit down.’ Finn mumbles, his voice a touch panicked as he guides Rey to the floor, her back pressed against the cupboard the printer sits on.

‘Rey, are you okay? What’s going on?’ Poe enquires as he crouches down in front of her, Finn on his knees next to her.

‘Get Leia.’ Finn states and Poe nods before springing to his feet and hurrying off toward the door.

Rey presses her hand against her forehead; her eyes scrunched shut as she breathes deeply.

‘That’s it just breath.’ Finn urges as he watches her carefully, hand rubbing up and down her arm in comfort.

A few moments later Poe returns with not just Leia but Han as well – he was visiting his wife and bolted for the door when Poe barged in stammering about Rey fainting.

‘Rey.’ Leia’s voice is pitchy as she crouches down next to her son’s girlfriend.

‘Are you okay? What happened? Poe told us you fainted.’ Leia questions, her tone motherly and concerned, her eyes scanning Rey’s pale yet slightly clammy face.

‘I-I I think I’m going to be sick.’ Rey pants and Han grabs the waste basket, upends it, emptying the contents onto the floor before shoving it under Rey’s head just in time for her to throw up into it.

‘Have you come down with something? A bug?’ Leia probes, her eyes still urgently searching Rey’s face, as the younger woman wipes her mouth with the back of her hand, eyes again closed.

She rests her head back against the cupboard and takes a few deep breaths. Leia looks round to find they’ve drawn quite an audience.

‘Back to work you lot. Now.’ Leia orders, and they all scurry back to their workstations. All except Poe and Finn who remain by Rey’s side, watching her with concern.

‘Rey?’ Leia presses her tone more commanding, and Rey slowly opens her eyes, looking toward her employer and boyfriend’s mother.

‘Are you okay? Have you been eating properly? Sleeping enough? I know Ben being in prison is a great strain, but you cannot neglect yourself. You have to look after yourself, Rey.’ Leia sounds so motherly that tears well in Rey’s eyes, and she can’t fight them back when they tumble from her eyes and roll down her cheeks.

‘Come on. Let’s get you to my office.’ Leia says and Poe and Finn go to help Rey up.

‘I need my bag and the toilet.’ She mutters, feeling a flush burn brightly across her cheeks.

‘Okay. I’ll come with you. Han grab Rey’s bag.’ She orders and her husband looks confused by the request. But luckily for him Poe has dashed over to the hot desk Rey had been using and grabbed it instead.

‘Thanks.’ Rey mumbles as Leia takes it from him.

‘Both of you. Thank you.’ Rey smiles weakly at both Poe and Finn. They nod in reply before Leia and Han guide her from the bustling office and into the stairwell.

o-o-o-o-o

Rey is sat on the toilet, her eyes wide and mouth hanging open as she stares at the positive pregnancy test held loosely between her trembling hands.

She’s pregnant.

o-o-o-o-o

Rey takes a deep breath as she walks in line into the visitors’ room of the federal prison. Her heart is hammering in her chest, both anxiety, nerves and a little bit of trepidation curl in her still queasy stomach.

Still nervous about being at a federal prison despite the fact that in the few weeks Ben’s been locked away she’s gone every week. Her heart breaks every time she sees him behind the Perspex in his prison issue grey sweater and jogging bottoms.

Her heart breaks every time she has to pick up the phone to speak to him. Every time she presses her hand to the Perspex and he reaches up and does the same. Every time she has to say goodbye. Every time she walks out of the door leaving him there her knees buckle and her breath comes out in ragged gasps.

Her heart breaks every single time.

Rey pulls the plastic chair back; it scrapes loudly along the concrete. Tears prick in her eyes, just from seeing Ben’s face, complete with reassuring smile. He looks well enough, albeit a little tired; the dark circles around his eyes are an easy indication that all is not entirely well.

She sits down and quickly picks up the receiver and Ben follows does the same.

‘Hey you.’ Rey croaks, trying to swallow down her tears and sound stronger than she feels.

‘Hey buttercup.’ Ben murmurs, and Rey lets out a sharp breathe, her chin wobbling as she presses her fingers to her lips.

‘Hey, hey, what’s wrong? Rey, what’s going on? Why are you crying?’ Ben panics, leaning forward in his chair, trying to catch her eye.

‘I’m-I’m pregnant.’ She sobs, the fat hot tears now flowing down her cheeks as she looks up to see Ben’s stunned face.

‘Pre-pregnant?’ Ben mumbles to himself, placing the receiver down on the small shelf in front of him.

Rey brushes the tears from her flush skin with the backs of her hand as she watches his reaction carefully. Seeing the shock, disbelief, fear and delight flit across his face one after another.

‘Ben?’ She mutters into the receiver, despite the fact that his is on the shelf.

‘Ben.’ Rey says louder, her eyes scanning his face with worry, until the broad and joyful grin spreads across his lips.

Ben picks up the receiver, tears welling in his eyes.

‘I’m going to be a Father.’ He gasps, a tear escaping his eye and rolling down his cheek.

‘We’re going to be parents. How far gone are you? Have you been to the doctor yet? When did you find out?’ Ben fires a barrage of questions at her and Rey can’t help but giggle at his enthusiasm.

She then tells him about what happened in the office. That Leia knows and got her an appointment with Dr. Kalonia who confirmed the news.

‘So when are you due?’ Ben asks, his voice cracking with apprehension and Rey knows why. He’s worried that she’s due before he’s out of prison.

‘January 5. You’ll be out by then.’ Rey smiles lovingly at him and he nods, but there’s still something in his eyes that tells her he’s worried he’ll miss the birth.

‘Hey, don’t worry. I’m not going to let this little bubba out before it’s Daddy’s out.’ Rey reassures him and Ben gives her a crocked smile as he nods slowly.

‘I want you to film everything, okay? All your classes, your appointments. I want you to photograph everything as well. Every day. I want reels of photos of your stomach. I want all the scans and reports. I want everything. I might not be able to be with you physically, but I want be part of this in some way.  And I mean more than just a sperm donor.’ Ben smiles and tears stream down Rey’s face.

‘Ben.’ She sniffles, wiping her nose with the back of her hand.

‘You should move in with my Mother, just while you’re pregnant. I don’t want you alone Rey. Not during this. You need people around you, to support you. People who can do things for you and with you.……While I’m stuck in fucking prison.’ Ben snaps, his anger clear in his tone, but she can understand it.

‘Ben. You’re the baby’s Father. That’s the biggest thing of all, apart from being the Mother.’ She chuckles and even he manages a soft chuckle despite his despondent look.

‘You can do everything with them as they grow up. No-one will ever take your place. You’ll be the one who picks them up when they fall. Guide them through their mistakes without judgment even when it breaks your heart. You’ll be the one who holds them when they cry, when they break the rules. You’ll be the proudest Dad in the room, in every room. Because you’re their Father Ben.’ Rey tells him and Ben lets the tears flow.

‘I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.’ He croaks, looking ashamed at his weakness and self pity.

‘You don’t have to apologise to me. Not about this.’ Rey soothes.

‘But I ruined your moment.  I'e ruined everything.’ Ben mumbles.

‘You haven't ruin anything.  This, this is just a stumbling block.  We'll get through this okay, because that's what we do.  I love you, don’t forget that.’ She smirks when he whips his head up to look at her, seeing as she just used his line.

‘Did you just steal my line?’

‘Who me? Nah.’ Rey chuckles and the genuine smile returns to Ben’s face.

o-o-o-o-o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)
> 
> I own nothing other than the idea - the characters are all Disney/Lucasfilm


	5. Chapter 5

o-o-o-o-o

June

Rey is sat nervously tapping her foot as she and Leia wait for her to be called for her twelve-week scan. Her bladder feels like it’s going to explode and the only thing keeping her calm is the tapping. It’s also distracting her from thinking about how Ben should be here holding her hand, waiting impatiently to see their fetus on the screen.

Leia turns her head and looks at Rey and smile softly as she places a warm hand on top of Rey’s trying to comfort the young woman. Rey’s leg falls still and she takes a deep breath and feigns a smile.

Rey had done as Ben had asked and moved into Leia’s fancy apartment in the rich part of the city. It turned out that Leia didn’t live too far from where she’d lived with Ben, back when he was Kylo Ren and working at First Order News. It had pleased him when she told him, a relief washed over his tired and resigned eyes and it broke her heart yet again.

‘Rey Kenobi.’ A middle-aged woman smiles from the doorway from one of the ultrasound rooms. 

Rey takes a sharp breath and Leia gives her hand a squeeze, before the two women rise to their feet and head into the room.

‘If you can lie on the bed and lower your trousers to your hips and raise your top to just beneath your chest.’ The woman instructs Rey who quietly does as she’s told.

Rey looks over at Leia who smiles reassuringly at her, the camera held tightly in her hand, filming this monumental moment just as Ben had requested. She’d told the sonographer that she’d be filming the ultrasound and the moment the woman went to object Leia shut her down. Telling her that no way would her son miss seeing this moment even if it’s not in person with his own eyes.

Rey lets out a faint giggle as the cool gel is squirted onto her still reasonably flat tummy. She looks up at the screen near the head of the bed as the ultrasound wand is placed over her skin. Her breath catches in her throat and she’s sure her heart has stopped beating.

The sound of the sonographers voice blurs out as Rey’s attention focuses on the fetus the size of a lime on the screen. Happy tears roll down her cheeks as Leia squeezes her hand, a look of clear and utter joy on the older woman’s face.

‘That’s my grand baby.’ Leia chokes and Rey beams at her.

The sonographer does all the necessary checks, pointing things out to them and smiling warmly as Rey brushes away her tears of joy. Soon the scan is over and she and Leia are walking back out into the reception, Rey clutching two copies of the scan.

Leia’s switches her phone back on and it instantly bursts into life. She has ten missed calls all from Han. Her brows furrow, it’s not like Han to call her so consistently, not unless he’s in trouble.

‘What does he want?’ Leia mutters to herself and rolls her eyes, a gesture Rey catches and smirks at.

‘Han, this better be good. You know I’m at Rey’s scan.’ Leia barks when Han picks up after the first ring – a sure sign of trouble.

‘Leia, shut up.’ Han blurts and from the tone of his voice he’s not in the mood for bantering.

‘What? What is it?’ Leia’s tone lowers as her eyes fall to the floor.

‘It’s Ben, Leia. It’s Ben.’ Han sounds serious and Leia’s heart drops. She gulps, her throat going dry as she looks over at Rey, who’s watching her with furrowed brows.

‘What-what do you mean?’ Leia tries to keep the fear and panic out of her voice, but its there and Rey bites her bottom lip.

‘He’s in the hospital. He got attacked-‘

‘When? Is he okay?’ Leia interrupts and now Rey steps closer, eyes scanning Leia’s face.

‘What? Is it Ben?’ Rey panics, trying to get Leia’s attention.

‘This morning in the yard. He was set on by a gang. He took a beating, he’s in the hospital getting fixed up. Don’t worry, sweetheart. He’s in the best place.’ Han tells her quickly, stopping her from interrupting.

‘How bad is he?’ Leia demands and Rey is on the verge of screaming, her chest is quickly rising and falling rapidly as panic sets in.

‘A coupe of broken ribs, a fractured cheekbone. Cuts and bruises.’ Han explains.

‘We’re on our way.’ Leia states.

‘No. No. You can’t.’

‘What?’ Leia snaps.

‘Ben doesn’t want to see anyone. Not like this. That includes Rey. Especially Rey. Not until he’s better.’ Han sighs and Leia glances at her son’s girlfriend.

‘Where are you?’ Leia enquires, turning her back on Rey, needing to compose herself.

‘At-at the hospital.’ Han grumbles, sounding regretful that he’s there when Leia and Rey can’t be.

‘Well is he okay?’ 

‘He’s alright. Scowling like normal.’ Han sighs.

‘Give him our love.’ Leia tells her husband before hanging up.

She turns to a clearly distressed Rey and takes her trembling hand.

‘It’s Ben. He’s in the hospital.’

‘What? Is he okay?’ 

‘He’s got a couple of broken ribs and a fractured cheekbone. Some cuts and bruises.’

What happened? Who did it?’

‘He was attacked in the yard by a gang.’

‘Come on, we’ve got to go.’

‘Rey, no. Ben doesn’t want us there. He doesn’t want to see anyone, not until he’s better.’

‘But-but I’m his girlfriend. I’m having his baby.’ Rey snaps, angry but not at Leia.

‘I know. I know.’ Leia murmurs as she grips Rey’s trembling hand.

o-o-o-o-o

‘So are you going to tell me what really happened?’ Han crosses his arms over his chest as he stands next to his son’s bed.

Ben looks a sorry state. His cheek swollen, his eye closed and cuts and bruises littering his face.

‘Like I said. I got attacked in the yard by a gang.’

‘Why?’ Han presses.

Ben shrugs, wincing with pain and Han huffs softly.

‘The truth Ben.’

‘It was Snoke. One of them said, “Snoke sends his regards.”’ Ben explains with a sigh.

‘Ben.’ Han sighs loudly, his hands gripping the metal rail at the foot of the bed.

‘It was going to happen eventually. Snoke had a lot of people in his pocket. I’m just surprised it took so long really.’ Ben tells his Father.

‘You know that I’m going to have to report this.’ Han replies stepping around the bed and pulling over the white plastic chair and sitting down.

‘I know. That means a transfer right?’ Ben mutters bitterly as he turns his head toward his Father.

‘I’ll do my best to get you in state, but seeing as these were Federal charges and I called in almost all my favours to shorten your sentence I don’t think I have much leverage left.’ Han grumbles, looking sorry before glancing away, not wanting to see the pain in his son’s eyes.

‘I understand.’

‘I don’t think Rey or your Mother will.’ Han huffs giving his son a feigned weak smile.

o-o-o-o-o

Han slowly closes the door. He’d done his absolute best, but to no avail. Ben will be moved to another Federal prison, a five-hour drive away.

‘Han?’ Leia calls from the living room. He slowly pulls off his jacket as he hears hurried footsteps before seeing the two women.

‘How’s Ben?’ Rey asks immediately, her face a picture of worry.

‘He’s okay. Just sore and grumpy.’ Han replies giving her an attempt at a reassuring smile.

‘When can we see him?’ Leia asks hoping that her husband had changed their son’s mind.

‘He doesn’t want to see anyone. Not until he’s more healed.’ Han answers as he moves past them and down the corridor toward the kitchen.

‘I could use a drink.’ He mutters to himself as Leia and Rey follow him.

‘But that’s not fair.’ Rey complains.

‘Yeah well, life isn’t fair kid.’ Han grumbles as he grabs a cold beer from the fridge.

‘Did the doctor’s say when he should be recovered and willing to take visitors?’ Leia enquires watching her husband’s face and seeing a slight flinch as he sips his beer.

‘A few weeks.’ He replies quickly before sipping on his beer again.

‘Han, what aren’t you telling me?’ Leia asks sternly, hand on hip and eyes steely.

Rey looks between the people who are her unborn baby’s grandparents.

‘Nothing.’

‘Han, don’t lie to me.’

‘Okay. Ben’s being transferred. Tomorrow morning he’s moving to a Federal prison a five hour drive away.’ Han states his eyes a mix of annoyance and pain.

Rey’s mouth falls open in shock and she has to grip the counter to keep herself upright.

‘What? Why?’ She gasps.

‘For his safety.’

‘His safety? He should have been safe where he is? What makes them think he’ll be any safer hours away? Whoever did this probably has a long reach into every prison.’ Rey rants and Han feels bad, while Leia tries to calm the girl down.

‘It was Snoke. Ben told me that the men who attacked him said, “Snoke sends his regards”.’ Han tells them and both of them look distraught.

‘I won’t be able to see him. I can’t do a ten hour round trip every week.’ Rey begins to cry and Leia steps over and pulls the upset young woman into her arms and Rey clings to her while sobbing.

o-o-o-o-o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read this chapter :)
> 
> Thank you for the feedback and kudos' :D


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments, they are like light to me :) and I never mean to upset anyone, but I like angst in my stories :D
> 
> Also I hope you guys are okay with how I'm portraying Finn and Poe in this one in comparison to Dangerous Woman?

o-o-o-o-o

July

Rey is sat in the canteen of The Resistance, head held up by the palm of her hand. She’s tired, and has barely touched the sandwich sat in front of her.

‘Rey.’ Finn says softly as he sits down opposite her.

She slowly lifts her head, her eyelids half closed. She forces a fake smile and Finn frowns as Poe sits down next to his boyfriend. Rey is far too pale, and there are dark circles beneath her eyes.

‘How you doing?’ Poe asks gently, as he looks over at her pale and drawn face.

‘I’m okay.’ She mumbles, looking back down at the BLT on brown bread and small serving of celery and carrot sticks.

‘Rey.’ Finn says and she looks up at him again.

‘You need to eat.’ He states and she rolls her eyes.

‘You sound like Leia.’ She mutters, despondent and tired.

‘Doesn’t that tell you something. That you need to eat.’ Finn points out, pushing her tray a little closer to her.

‘I’m not hungry.’ She sighs, pushing it away.

‘Rey, you have to eat. Your baby needs nutrients and sustenance. You need to eat.’ Poe urges, watching her carefully.

‘I’m not hungry.’

‘Rey, please. You have to eat. If not for you, then for your baby. Your baby needs food. Come on please. I know you’re missing Ben, but he wouldn’t want you to do this to yourself. You have to eat.’ Finn pleads and Rey breaks down in tears, her whole body trembling as she lets out a desperate sob.

‘Oh Rey.’ Finn gasps as he jumps to his feet and dashes around the table and pulls her into his arms as he sits in the chair next to her.

‘I miss him so much. I don’t know what to do.’ Rey sobs into Finn’s chest, her hands clinging to his t-shirt.

‘Aw peanut, it’s going to be okay. I know you miss him. But you’ve got to be strong for him and your baby.’ Finn whispers in her ear, trying to find the right words to support his heartbroken ex.

‘I haven’t seen him in weeks. I need to see him. I have to see him. It’s breaking my heart.’ She continues to sob; her tears wetting Finn’s blue t-shirt as he rubs his hands up and down her back.

‘Oh peanut.’ Finn murmurs.

‘Why don’t we take you, to see him?’ Poe suggests and Rey looks up at him, her hazel eyes flooded with tears. 

‘Wh-what?’ She sniffles, straightening up a little, but Finn keeps his arms loosely around her middle.

‘Yeah. Me and Finn. We’ll take you to see Ben.’ Poe nods a small smile on his lips.

‘You’d….you’d do that?’ Rey gasps, wide-eyed, disbelieving yet hopeful as she looks between the two men.

‘Of course.’ Poe states clearly as he looks at her and then Finn.

‘But why?’ Rey cannot believe their kind and generous offer as she looks between them.

‘Because it’s the right thing to do.’ Finn says, smiling down at her.

‘But it’s like a ten-hour round trip.’ She points out, needing them to know what is involved in their offer.

Poe shrugs as he continues to smile warmly at her.

‘It’ll be fun. A road trip. So are you in?’ Poe questions and tears fall quickly from Rey’s eyes as she gives him a teary smile and nods.

‘Yes. Of course. I’m definitely in.’ She enthuses.

‘So when’s you’re next visit scheduled?’ Finn enquires and Rey looks down at her hands in her lap.

‘I’ve not got one. But I can get one. I just have to call the prison.’ Rey tells them, trembling with hope and for the first time in days there’s a genuine smile on her lips.

Finn presses a kiss into her hair as he stands up and walks back round the table. The thought of seeing Ben so soon inspires Rey to pick up her sandwich and take a bite, much to Poe and Finn’s relief.

o-o-o-o-o

Rey had called the prison and secured a visiting order for two days time. Before she rather reluctantly and shyly informed Leia and Han that she was going to see Ben without them. But they were happy for her. They’d both seen how depressed and down she’d been, so Rey going without them was not an issue.

o-o-o-o-o

It’s 4am and Rey is waiting for Finn to one-dial her to let her know that they’re downstairs. She’s gripping her phone tightly in her hand as Leia and Han sit tired and bleary eyed on the couch.

Her visiting order is for 10am and with a five-hour drive and a brief stop they should get there with time to spare.

Her phone bursts into life and despite expecting it, it makes Rey jump before it cuts off.

‘Okay, I’m off.’ Rey mumbles as she looks over at Han and Leia, who get to their feet.

She embraces them both and Leia kisses her cheek.

‘Tell Ben we love him and we’ll see him as soon as possible, okay?’ Leia asks of her and of course Rey can do that. She smiles softly at the older woman before hugging her again, burying her face into Leia’s shoulder.

‘Now go. See Ben and travel safe.’ Leia smiles warmly as Rey grabs her backpack and heads for the door.

She looks over her shoulder and smiles at Han and Leia before slipping out and on her way.

o-o-o-o-o

It is 09.23 when Poe pulls into the car park of the Federal Prison that Ben currently calls home. Rey’s heart jumps into her throat as she looks up at it. The sun is already bearing down on them, and it’s starting to get hot. They are in the dessert after all. Poe and Finn had insisted on a breakfast stop at around 7am, and for the first time in weeks Rey ate a whole plate of pancakes with maple syrup and chocolate sauce.

They’d mentioned that her skin had more colour to it, and they even swore she was glowing a little. While she was still angry that Ben had refused to see her, or his parents while he recovered from his injuries, she also understood. She knew that she’d have been an emotional wreck at the sight of him, with her hormones playing a big part. 

But now knowing that his injuries will be barely visible she feels more confident in keeping herself together. If not for herself, but for him. She doesn’t want him to feel worse about his situation than he already does.

His letters had been her lifeline, even if she was still walking through her life like a ghost. They were a source of strength. Inspiring her to get up every morning, and to function in her life – even if sleep and an appetite were strangers to her.

Rey is shaking like a leaf as she waits in line to be let into the visitors’ room. Her heart is pounding in her chest and she feels positively queasy. She takes a few deep gulps of air as the line begins to move in front of her. Her hands are balled into fists, and she gulps heavily as she takes her first unsteady step.

The moment she’s through the door and sees him sat at a table, not behind a Perspex partition she almost faints. 

‘Ben.’ She gasps, half sprinting and half staggering in his direction.

Ben rises to his feet, a shy smile on his face as Rey flings her arms around his neck. Hot, fat tears fall from her eyes as she buries her face into his chest, while he wraps his arms around her and holds her tight against him.

The sound of his heartbeat and breath is like music to her.

‘I love you so much.’ Rey mumbles against his sternum, before pressing a tender kiss there.

‘Cut it out you two. Sit down.’ A guard growls and Ben’s hands shift to Rey’s waist and push her away from him. Rey doesn’t stop the sob that escapes her lips.

The two of them sit down either side of the table and Rey can’t wipe the teary smile off her face as she just stares at him.

‘You look tired and thin.’ Ben states, his eyes full of concern as he watches her, his forearms resting on his knees.

‘So do you.’ Rey counters, not out of spite, but because he does.

‘I’m not pregnant Rey. You are.’ Ben points out and she can hear the regret in his tone at their situation.

‘I know. I’ve just been missing you so much. I can’t really sleep without your arms wrapped around me.’

‘Rey.’ Ben sighs sounding defeated.

‘I’m sorry.’ She mumbles, looking down at her knotted fingers in her lap.

‘No Rey. Don’t be sorry. Never be sorry about this. But you need to sleep and you clearly need to eat. Please.’ He begs, his eyes full of worry. Rey bites her lips together and nods.

‘It’s just so difficult. Its like part of my heart has been ripped out and I don’t know what to do. I’m so afraid.’ She cries, tears still rolling down her cheeks and under her jaw.

Ben glances over at the guard before leaning forward across the table. He reaches up and cups her jaw, instantly Rey leans into his touch and lets out a breathy sob as he gently brushes the tears from beneath her eyes and her cheek.

‘Don’t be afraid. I feel it too. But we’ll get through this. It’ll get better, I promise you.’ Ben smiles lovingly at her, the pad of his thumb caressing her cheek.

‘SOLO.’ The guard shouts across the room – no warning, just his name and Ben instantly sits back, loosing all contact and making Rey whimper at the loss.

o-o-o-o-o

Rey and Ben chat about this, that and everything in between. He enquires about his parents, uncle and Chewie. She tells him - at first a little reluctantly – about how Finn and Poe have been good friends to her over the past weeks and the smile on Ben’s face eases her concerns. He even went as far as encouraging her renewed connection with Finn, telling her that she needs people around her. He even tells her to thank them from him for being there for her.

But the one thing that they don’t discuss was her pregnancy. Rey realised quickly after she sat down that Ben would only look at her face. It was only by chance that she even saw his eyes drift down to her fuller waist, tears burning in his eyes before he looked away.

Rey didn’t mention her pregnancy after their very first interaction, not wanting to upset or anger him. Reminding him of what he’s missing out on, she’s not a cruel woman, least of all to him.

Before they know it their time is up and the guard is giving them a warning that they have five minutes. Rey’s heart skips a beat at the fact that this will be the last time she sees him for who knows how long.

‘I don’t want to leave you.’ She confesses, feeling guilty about putting that on him, especially when he sighs and closes his eyes.

‘I know. And I don’t want you to leave, but you have to. I’m sorry.’ Ben mutters, glancing down at the ground, his hands clasped together.

Those five minutes flash by and soon Rey is slowly and reluctantly rising to her feet. She’s feeling lightheaded and her breath is coming out in shallow pants. Ben steps to the end of the table and Rey bites her lips together, forcing herself not to cry. She inhales deeply through her nose as she looks up at him. 

‘I love you.’ He murmurs, for her ears only and Rey smiles and nods, finding it harder to keep her tears at bay.

‘I know. I love you more.’ She croaks, stepping closer to him and wrapping her arms around his neck, pulling him down toward her.

She doesn’t particularly care if the guard shouts her at, because she needs this. She needs to feel his lips, to feel his love. Ben presses a soft kiss to her lips and Rey sighs happily at the long lost feeling. The first kiss they’ve shared since the night before he left. 

Rey lets her hands move from his neck to settle on his hips, while Ben cups her jaw and kisses her so tenderly, so lovingly.

‘SOLO. CUT THAT OUT.’ The guard bellows from across the room and Rey feels something in her abdomen, like a fluttering. 

She quickly pulls back, now not wanting to get Ben in trouble, but her eyes are wide as she gazes up at him, her hand pressing to her abdomen.

‘What?’ Ben asks, his panicked eyes roaming all over her face.

‘I-I think our baby just moved.’ She gasps, a smile spreading across her face.

‘What?’ 

Rey feels it again, and quickly grabs Ben’s hand and presses it against her abdomen but the movement has gone. She looks up, disappointment in her eyes as Ben studies her face, his hand still pressed against her abdomen, eagerly waiting for something to happen.

Rey closes her eyes, feeling sad that he’s not felt it. But then it happens again and her eyes fire open. Looking straight into the delighted, awestruck and amazed eyes of the man she loves.

‘Our baby.’ He whispers, a grin on his face and Rey nods, fresh tears spilling from her eyes.

‘Our baby.’

o-o-o-o-o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :D


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the support shown this fic :)

o-o-o-o-o

August

Ben had been keeping his head down as well as he could, but being his height and build he couldn’t help but draw attention. And that attention was always unwanted.

He’s sat on his bed in his cell reading Rey’s latest letter. There are tears burning the back of his eyes, and a regretful, yet happy smile on his lips as she gives him a blow by blow account of Finn and Poe having an argument over pizza toppings – Poe championed the red, yellow and green peppers with chili beef while Finn prefers tuna and sweetcorn.

Ben’s happy that she’s got people other than his relatives in her life, especially now. Even if those people happen to be her ex and his boyfriend, but beggars can’t be choosers and he’s just relieved she’s not alone.

Rey also talks about how hot the summer has been so far in the city and Ben scoffs, rolling his eyes before wiping his forehead with the back of his hand. He’s never known heat like it; the desert feels like it’s trying to boil him alive. But he has to sympathise with her – he’s not pregnant.

The main subject of Rey’s letter is how her pregnancy is going. Telling him that she’s gained 5lb – which makee Ben grin happily. How she went to a childbirth class with Leia, who sat there with a tight jaw and frequent nods before giving details of his birth. By all accounts not an easy memory – he was a large baby.

She tells him about how Han and Leia told her she’s started to snore (loudly), when she isn’t tossing and turning because of her heartburn, leg cramps and sweating. Ben’s mood drops when he reads these developments, not being there and experiencing them with her cuts him to the core.

‘Well, well, well. Solo sitting all by himself. Solo!’ A chuckling voice breaks Ben’s focus on the letter and his eyes fly up to find the guard known as ‘Crusher’ filling the doorway.

Ben looks away, gripping his letter tighter.

‘Aw, tongue tied are we?’ Crusher sneers as he steps into Ben’s cell. Instantly Ben straightens his back, gulping as he watches Crusher out of the corner of his eye.

‘Not seen your pretty little girlfriend again. She hasn’t dumped you has she? Found herself someone better? Someone less ugly? She could do better, so much better. But clearly she likes a certain type doesn’t she? You never know, maybe she’ll give me a go. What do you think, huh? Do you think your little girlfriend will open her legs for me?’ Crusher sneers, a self satisfied and menacing smirk on his lips and a taunting devilish look in his eyes.

Ben desperately tries to hold himself together, not to let his anger out. Rey and his parents are visiting him in three days time; he can’t snap otherwise he wont get to see them.

‘Cat got your tongue huh Solo? Never mind eh. I’m sure she will. Especially if I tell her that if she doesn’t something terrible will happen to you.’ Crusher snickers, and Ben is now breathing heavily, Rey’s letter half screwed up in his clenched fist and his jaw is aching with tension.

‘You dare go near her.’ He grits out, rising to his feet.

‘And you’ll go what, huh? _You_ can’t touch me. No matter who your Daddy is. Because in here, I’m the boss.’ Crusher chuckles as two more guards appear in the doorway to Ben’s cell.

Ben eyes them cautiously, his stomach flip-flopping and he gulps heavily. They step forward into the already filled space and close the door behind them.

o-o-o-o-o

‘What’s the hold up?’ Leia complains as they stand in the waiting area outside the visitors’ room.

It’s the first time she and Han have travelled all that way to see Ben; Han simply shrugs at his wife. Rey is staring at the door, as if by the power of her will and gaze it will open and Ben will be standing behind it with a welcoming smile and strong-armed hug.

The door opens and those in front of them start to filter into the room, but a guard steps out blocking Rey’s path, startling her.

‘You Ben Solo’s family?’ He asks gruffly, looking down at Rey with leering eyes.

‘Yes.’ She snaps, her whole body starting to tremble with anger and a touch of fear.

‘Can you come with me, _please_.’ He orders rather than requests and Rey looks back at Han and Leia, who share a questioning look.

The three of them follow the guard into the office at the back of the room. Rey’s heart is threatening to beat out of her body as she comes to a stop behind the chairs as the guard sits behind the desk. He gestures to the chairs, but neither Rey nor Leia take the offered seats.

‘Okay.’ He mutters at their defiance.

‘What is going on? Where is Ben?’ Leia barks, taking the lead and asking the question all three of them want the answer to.

‘He’s in solitary confinement.’

‘What?’ Rey blurts with surprise.

‘Three days ago Ben attacked one of the guards-‘

‘Bullshit.’ Leia interrupts, venom and disbelief in her voice.

‘Excuse me? Your son injured one of my guards in an unprovoked attack. He has been signed off work for two weeks because of the injuries he sustained and then he will be only on light duties for two more weeks.’ The guard informs them.

‘I want to see my son.’ Leia scowls, folding her arms over her chest.

‘That’s not going to happen. He will be in solitary confinement as punishment for his behavior until a panel decides when he can return to the normal communal populace of the prison.’

‘I want to speak to the Prison Warden. Right now.’ Han finally pipes up his eyes fixed on the face of the guard.

‘He’s not available.’

‘Make him available.’

‘I can’t do that. The Warden is currently away on family business. He wont be back for days.’ The guard tries to hide the smirk but Rey sees it and her blood boils hot through her veins.

‘I need to see Ben. Now.’ Rey snarls, gripping the back of the chair, turning her knuckles white.

‘Like I said that’s not going to happen. Do you think if I let him see you that’s fair punishment for what he did, huh?’ He asks looking between their angry faces.

‘No. He has to pay for what he did.’ The guard declares.

‘And why did he apparently do it?’ Leia asks, her voice tight and controlled.

‘He wont say. Look you can stand there all day asking the same old questions, but the answer will still be the same. You’re not seeing him and that’s all there is too it.’ The guard states, his voice sound strained with annoyance.

‘Fine. We’ll go. But I am going to speak to the Warden about this, mark my words.’ Han informs the guard who doesn’t even look bothered.

‘You do what you gotta do.’ He nods, rising to his feet.

Han gestures for Leia and Rey to leave but Rey stops and turns to face the guard.

‘What are Ben’s injuries?’ She asks, feeling anxiety coil in her stomach.

‘A couple of fractured ribs and a busted wrist. Not to mention some cuts and bruises. Nothing that won’t heal.’ The guard replies as he ushers them out of the office.

o-o-o-o-o

Ben lifts his broken wrist, looking at the plaster cast. His whole body aches from the unprovoked attack, he lowers his arm to his side and winces as he takes a deep breath. He knows that Rey and his unborn child are so close, yet so far. A tear rolls from the corner of his eyes toward his ear. He lets it.

o-o-o-o-o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)
> 
> Let me know what you think.
> 
> Or if you want to make a request - even if it's a fic request that's cool :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the support shown this fic - I know it's pretty depressing and bleak but it will all end well, so please stick with me. And if you can't thank you for your time.

o-o-o-o-o

September

‘Today is your lucky day, Solo.’ Crusher sneers as he steps into Ben’s cell after unlocking the door.

Ben slowly looks over from the end of the bed he’s sitting on. His whole appearance is disheveled, his hair is wild and there are distinct black circles and bags to his eyes and he’s even more pale than normal.

‘It must be nice knowing people in high places.’ Crusher snarls, a look of disgust on his face as he steps in even closer.

Ben watches him carefully, his plastered wrist resting in his lap, still vulnerable.

‘Your parents kicked off with the Prison Warden about your supposed “poor” treatment. Your mother, now there’s a firecracker. I bet she was a looker when she was younger. Anyway, she threatened to write an article about the conditions and standards of this prison in her little paper. The Warden didn’t want to get into a war of words with a former politician, or the Director of the FIA. Now there is someone who can pull all the right strings. Your father, Han Solo. Your mother can make as many threats about “exposing sub standard care of inmates” but it’s your father with the real power. And he’s got you a transfer to state. So get your pasty white ass up off that bed, and get the fuck out of my prison.’ Crusher growls, his eyes turning dark as he glowers at Ben.

Ben slowly climbs off the bed, keeping his eyes fixed on the guard, he will never trust him. He goes to step forward when Crusher slams his fist into Ben’s stomach, doubling him over and winding him. 

‘You’re a lucky bastard Solo.’ Crusher hisses in his ear before storming out of the cell, leaving Ben gasping for breath.

o-o-o-o-o

Ben winces as he climbs out of the transport vehicle. His feet, wrists and waist are chained – despite the plaster cast – and he has to shuffle in order not to trip. The ride has been slow and arduous – four hours of silence stuck in a tiny cell. He feared he’d loose his mind. Only thoughts of Rey and being closer to both her and their baby kept him calm.

He’s led into the prison, the chains jangling as he moves. He doesn’t get to see his new home – it’s after dark and the only light are floodlights powerful enough to leave dots in your vision and make you squint if you looked up. So he doesn’t.

‘Ben.’ He hears that familiar gruff drawl and sees his father standing with a man in a suit as the chains are removed from his ankles and waist.

‘Dad.’ He croaks, his voice horse from the silence.

‘How you doing kid?’ Han asks as he takes a half step forward.

‘I’ve been better. How’s Rey?’ He replies before being ushered forward.

‘She’s fine. The baby is fine. Your mother is fine. Everyone is fine. Just worried about you that’s all.’ Han answers as he watches as the cuffs are removed from Ben’s wrists.

Ben grimaces as the cuff over his cast is removed, pain shoots through his arm. The guard pauses, looking down at the cracked plaster where the cuff had been. It had clearly been too tight.

‘We’ll get the doctor to take a look at that.’ He informs Ben, who simply nods.

‘You need to strip for a cavity search.’ The guard then says, pointing to another part of the room. Ben’s eyes fall to the floor and he feels a blush burn his cheeks.

He takes a deep breath before stepping over to the point where the guard pointed. He glances over at his father and the man in a suit and gulps slowly. He really doesn’t want his father to see him like this, to see this humiliation. But Han makes no moves to leave.

Ben’s kicks off his slip on shoes before he moves to undo the poppers on his orange prison issue jumpsuit. He takes a sharp breath before peeling it off, his eyes watering as he leans down to pull it from his feet. He turns around as he pulls his white t-shirt off, not wanting Han to see the pain etched in his face or the no doubt fresh bruises to his ribs. 

Ben hears a sharp intake of breath from his father’s direction, his back toward him and he realizes that it’s probably the first time he’s seen the fallen angel tattoo that covers his back. But he doesn’t pause; he’s done this routine before. Instead he blanks his mind from every single thought as he takes off his prison issue underwear, kicking it to the side. He doesn’t even need prompt to rest his hands against the wall and spread his legs apart. This is a humiliation he will remember forever, it will never leave him.

Han averts his eyes as his son is given his cavity search, there are some things a parent should never witness, and this is surely one of them. He cautiously looks back over at Ben when he hears the rustling of material, to find Ben now facing him, standing there in just a pair of white boxers.

He can clearly see the ugly scar on Ben’s abdomen from the gunshot, but that’s not what causes his brows to furrow – no it’s the fresh blue and purple bruises just below his diaphragm that intrigue him.

‘Who did that?’ He asks directly, and Ben drops his gaze.

‘No-one.’ He mumbles and Han shakes his head, sighing loudly.

‘Don’t lie to me Ben. Who. Did that?’ Han asks firmer, his eyes burning into the skull of his son.

‘No-one.’ Ben snips, looking up at his father, seeing frustration build in Han’s eyes as he shakes his head again.

‘Ben, you don’t have to lie. Someone did that to you. Now tell me who?’ Han demands, hands on his hips and determination on his face.

Ben chooses to ignore his father and continues to pull on his new clothes – gone is the orange jumpsuit and in place he’s now got light grey sweat pants, white t-shirt and light grey sweater. But he gets to keep the white slip-ons.

Eventually the processing procedure comes to an end and Ben is taken to a small room with his father. He sits down opposite Han, resting his wrist on the table between them.

‘It was a guard wasn’t it?’ Han offers as an opening line, Ben looks down.

‘I should report them, have their badge.’ Han snaps and Ben’s gaze fires up.

‘Dad. Please. I’m out of there now. There’s no need-‘

‘No need. Ben he broke your wrist, your ribs. And he gave you a parting shot. Whoever he is, he needs punishing. He can’t go around beating on the inmates for his own amusement.’ Han rants and Ben sighs heavily, silencing his father.

They sit in silence; an awkward tension falling between them and it only seems to grow. It’s broken when the door to the room is opened and a guard steps in to tell them that it’s time for Ben to go to his cell before lockdown.

Han nods and gets to his feet, watching as Ben slowly gets to his. 

‘I’ll see you soon, okay?’ Han smiles and Ben nods as he’s led out of the room.

o-o-o-o-o

Rey is sat nervously chewing on her thumbnail as she and Leia await Han’s return. Eventually they hear footsteps in the hall and Han appears in the doorway.

Despite Rey’s ever expanding middle she springs to her feet, eyes wide and eager.

‘How is he?’ She fires, not even giving Han time to say hello.

‘He’s….okay. Hello, by the way.’ Han smirks as he steps over to his wife and presses a kiss to the top of her head.

‘Why did you hesitate? What’s going on? Tell me? I need to know.’ Rey demands, her emotions falling all over the place.

Han sighs as he looks between his wife, and the mother of his unborn grandchild. They deserve to know, even if it’s not necessarily him who should tell them.

o-o-o-o-o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the continued support :)

o-o-o-o-o

October

Rey is sure that she’s waddling as she walks into the visitors room of the prison. She grins widely when she sees Ben sat there waiting patiently for her. He springs to his feet at the sight of her, his eyes full of love and warmth.

He leans over the desk and presses a quick kiss to her lips before watching her sit down. Rey feels big enough already without the fact that she’s still got twelve weeks left to go. But everyone keeps telling her that her bump is hardly anything and really cute.

‘You look beautiful.’ Ben murmurs, his eyes fixed on her bump and she blushes faintly at his compliment, because she feels far from beautiful.

‘Thank you.’ She replies coyly. 

‘How have you been?’ Ben enquires, his eyes only on her.

‘Oh, I’m okay. Back ache. Some leg cramps. Mostly at night but it’s okay. Because it’s all part of this experience. Can be difficult to massage my calf though.’ Rey smiles gently at him as she indicates toward her bump.

‘I’ve been learning a lot about our little one. His lungs are working now. And the little movements I’ve been feeling are him hiccupping. Oh and he has now got a sleeping routine.’ Rey beams at him and Ben smiles softly at her, but there’s a questioning look in his eyes.

‘His? Him? He? Do you know something you’re not telling me Rey Kenobi?’

Rey blushes, biting her lips together.

‘No.’

‘Then why are you referring to our baby as a boy?’ He presses.

‘I dunno. I just think he’s a he.’ She smiles, lightly rubbing her bump as she looks down at it and then up at Ben.

‘So you think we’re having a son, huh?’ He gives her a crocked half smile.

‘Yeah. A little boy. Who’ll be the spit of his Daddy.’ She smiles so lovingly, her thumb still caressing her bump.

‘Maker help him if he get my ears.’ Be chuckles and Rey gives him an admonishing look.

‘I like your ears. They’re cute.’ Ben scoffs shaking his head.

‘I went to my first breastfeeding class yesterday. It was…. Nice. But a little bit strange. Everyone was so lovely, but I dunno, the idea of a baby, you know, on my….’ she gestures toward her breasts, a red flush to her face that is simply adorable.

Ben shakes his head, pretending to not understand what she means or is implying. 

‘I don’t know what you mean sweetheart.’ He snickers and Rey scowls at him.

‘You know exactly what I mean Ben Solo.’ She snips, but there’s a playful smile on her face because she knows that he’s teasing her.

‘You know, I don’t know how I feel about anyone else getting to suck on your nipples-‘

‘Ben!’ Rey squeaks, her face now going scarlet as she looks around them quickly.

Ben chuckles and Rey instantly relaxes, the sight of a smile on his face makes her grin and forget her annoyance at objectifying her and her breasts.

‘I’m sorry buttercup. I was only teasing.’ He smiles, but his eyes are fixed on her fuller bust.

‘Ben. Eyes up.’ Rey chastises him and now he blushes after being caught staring.

Rey smirks, but a wicked thought flits into her mind. Now it’s Ben’s turn to squirm. She reaches up and cups her growing chest, looking down at them but then peeking at him through her eyelashes to find his mouth hanging open.

‘They are getting quite big though aren’t they? And there’s still so much time left before they’ll get used.’ She tells him, bouncing them a little.

‘Rey. Stop. Please. Stop.’ Ben grumbles, shifting uncomfortably in his seat and looking around to see if anyone else is looking. Only to find that at least three other people are.

Rey drops her hands to her lap, looking a little sheepish from the clear discomfort of her boyfriend. And the fact that others saw her.

‘Sorry.’ She mumbles and Ben sighs.

‘It’s okay.’

While he loves to hear about every little tiny thing and moment of her pregnancy not being there and experiencing them along side of her is like a punch to the heart.

o-o-o-o-o

November

‘Rey. Rey. Wake up.’ Luke ushers, gently touching Rey’s shoulder.

Her eyes flutter open and she takes a moment to focus, finding Luke smiling down at her.

‘Sorry. Was I sleeping?’ She mumbles, straightening up, looking embarrassed to have fallen asleep in class.

‘Are you not sleeping well?’ He enquires gently, sitting on the edge of the desk in front of Rey’s, folding his hands together in his lap.

Rey shakes her head, before looking down at her bump. She places her hand on it and brushes her thumb over it, a small contented smile on her lips.

‘I just can’t get comfortable. And then when I do I then need to go to the bathroom. I’m just so tired. And it’s not just physically.’ She looks ashamed to admit that she’s not dealing with things completely.

‘You’re missing Ben.’ Luke states the obvious and Rey looks up at him with a mix of exasperation and disbelief that he’s actually said it, as if it were a secret.

‘I just never thought that I’d be alone. When we spoke, albeit briefly, about starting a family before everything happened I didn’t think I’d be dealing with everything by myself. I know that Leia and Han are there doing as much as they can. And Finn and Poe. And you. But-but I can’t curl up in their arms at night. They can’t hold and sooth me. Whisper in my ear in the dark. Reassure me like he can. Love me the way he does.’ Her eyes brim with tears and she angrily rubs at her eyes.

‘Rey, it’s okay to show weakness. It’s natural. No-one is strong all the time.’ Luke tells her a half smile on his face.

‘Leia is.’ Rey grumbles and Luke lets out a barked laugh that startles her.

‘My sister appears strong. But inside she’s as afraid as anyone. She just knows how to hide it. Years of practice. Being a politician I daresay.’ Luke smiles and Rey does feel a touch reassured to know that the strong and solid Leia Organa feels fear.

‘Come on. Let me drive you home.’ Luke offers as he stands up and Rey’s brows furrow.

‘You-you drive?’ Rey blurts with surprise. She never knew this about Ben’s uncle.

‘Of course. I was quite the racer when I was younger.’ Luke grins as he shuffles toward his desk.

Rey eases up out of the chair, letting out a heavy breath from the increasing exertion being pregnant is taking. She wobbles, her balance is a bit off. She lets out a sigh, and pulls her satchel off the back of her chair, before shuffling after her professor.

o-o-o-o-o

Rey grips her back as she slowly walks into the visitors’ room after everyone else. Her eyes light up when she sees Ben jump to his feet, a happy expression on his face. 

‘You’re getting so big.’ He grins and Rey scowls at him.

‘Thanks.’ She grumbles as she slowly eases down into the chair.

‘I-I didn’t mean, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.’ Ben looks ashamed and guilty, and Rey sighs.

‘No. It’s fine. I am. I’m huge.’ Rey complains, gesturing toward her bump and looking sorrowful.

‘No you’re not. You’re beautiful, you hear me. You are beautiful. You’re the most incredible and beautiful woman in the entire world. Do you hear me, Rey.’ Ben’s voice is so earnest as he leans forward his eyes boring into her, imploring her to believe his words.

‘You’re just saying that.’

‘No I’m not. I’m not just saying it. I mean it. Every single word Rey. I love you. I’ve been in love with you from the moment I first laid eyes on you. And you grow more beautiful by the day. And to see your belly so full with my child, just makes you even more wondrous. You are a goddess Rey. A true goddess.’ Ben urges her to believe him, to believe his words and the impassioned look in his eyes. 

Rey chews the corner of her bottom lip embarrassed by her weakness and complaint.

‘But what if I can’t cope.’ Rey mutters under her breath.

‘What do you mean?’ He asks gently, seeing the worry in her eyes.

‘With the labour. What if I can’t deal with the pain? Or they have to cut me open? What if…..what if I can’t cope with it? Any of it. Or being a mother. What if I’m a terrible mother? What if our baby hates me?’ Rey begins to sob, fat tears spilling from her eyes.

Ben doesn’t care about being reprimanded by the guard; all he cares about is Rey. Comforting her, supporting her. Loving her. He jumps out of his chair and round to his girlfriend’s side, pulling her into his strong arms and burying her head into his chest as she lets out a pitiful sob.

‘Enough.’ The guard calls from across the room and Ben presses a kiss to Rey’s forehead before reluctantly pulling away from her.

‘Now you listen to me okay? You are the bravest, most generous, most kind and brilliant woman I have ever met. You are going to be the most incredible mother in the entire world. No one will ever compare. You will love our child beyond anything. You will guide them and teach them everything that they ever need to know, because you, Rey, are everything that is great in this world. Everything.’ Ben states, his voice full of raw honesty and his eyes equal so as he sits down opposite her again.

‘I’m-I’m sorry.’ Rey mumbles.

‘No Rey. You do not apologise to me. Never apologise to me. Never.’

Rey looks up at him and offers him a crooked shy smile. It’s what she wanted to hear. His words. His passion. His love.

‘You made me a better man. You made me want to be a better man. You did that, because you’re fantastic and impulsive, and crazy and wild and so full of love and compassion. You forgave me when I didn’t deserve to be forgiven. But because you have a heart so full of love and light you saved me. And I am forever in your debt.’ Ben tells her, his voice so earnest that it makes Rey gulp.

She doesn’t know what to say, what can she say to that?

‘I love you more than you will ever know.’ She eventually croaks, emotions running free in her body.

o-o-o-o-o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :D
> 
> Let me know what you think
> 
> Hopefully you guys didn't find this chapter as sad and depressing as the previous ones??
> 
> We're heading towards the end.......


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the feedback - it is a great motivator :D
> 
> Now we've caught up - it's birth day!!!

o-o-o-o-o

December

Rey groans as she shifts onto her back and then onto her other side. She’s been awake for over an hour with what feels like menstrual cramps. Some of the pains are so bad they’ve brought tears to her eyes. She casts her eyes up toward the clock – it’s only 12.39 and she lets out a loud sigh.

‘You can’t sleep eh?’ She mutters into the darkness, her hand stroking her large bump. 

Another cramping pain grips Rey and she bites her lips together, face scrunching up as she tries to breathe through it. They’re getting worse, more intense. 

It’s too soon. While she has only two weeks left till her due date, that’s not why it’s too soon. Ben is still in prison. He doesn’t get out for another day. He doesn’t get out until Christmas Eve.

Rey shuffles to the edge of the bed, her hand pressed hard to the bottom of her bump and sweat breaking out on her forehead. She breathes hard as she slowly climbs out from beneath the covers, and another pain makes her stop.

‘No. No, little one. It’s too soon. It’s too soon. Your daddy’s not here yet. We can’t do this without him. Just hang on for another day, yeah? Can you do that for me, huh?’ Rey whispers breathlessly to her unborn child, her eyes closing and a tear rolls down her flush cheek.

For the past week Rey has been having intermittent contractions and was told they were Braxton Hicks contractions by her midwife. But there’s just something about these pains that feel different, they feel like the real thing.

Rey stands up, her feet a little unsteady but she takes a deep breath and slowly makes her way across the room toward the bedroom door. Her palm is a little clammy as she opens the door and steps out into the dimly lit hallway. 

Rey cradles her bump as she makes her way slowly down the hall toward Leia’s bedroom. She feels bad about waking her, and hopes to everyone that she’s not interrupting anything because she knows that Han is in there too.

With a slightly trembling hand Rey knocks lightly on the door, and waits. But there’s no noise – no voice calling out, or shuffling of movement. Nothing. So she knocks a bit harder, before pressing her hand flat against the wood when she’s gripped with another contraction. They’re getting closer and stronger.

‘Leia.’ Rey grits through clenched teeth, her eyes scrunched closed.

‘I think I’m in labour.’ She growls, sagging against the wall next to the door and sliding down to the floor.

She hears voices in the room and urgent movement. Just as the door flies open Rey’s waters break, and she slowly looks up to find Leia and Han dressed hastily, staring down at her.

‘I’m sorry.’ She lets out a choked sob, her face flushing with shame.

‘Oh nonsense. You don’t need to apologise.’ Leia coos as she crouches down next to Rey, holding Rey’s hand while her other strokes down Rey’s hot cheek.

‘Now come on. Lets get you up and ready to go to the hospital, and meet this little one.’ Leia smiles warmly, but her smile doesn’t quite reach her eyes, because her son isn’t there.

Together Han and Leia ease Rey to her feet before Leia takes the young woman’s weight against her petite frame and slowly walking her down the hallway.

‘It’s too soon. He’s not here.’ Rey mutters sadly.

With Rey’s arm slung over her shoulders and Leia brushing her thumbs over Rey’s hand and side respectively the two women make their way to the front door.

‘Han.’ Leia barks looking over her shoulder at her husband who is just standing there, he jumps and dashes forward toward them.

‘Get Rey’s hospital bag from her room. It’s on the floor by the door. Also grab her cell and hurry the hell up.’ Leia orders and Han scurries off with his instructions.

‘It’s too soon. He’s not here. He’s not here. I can’t do this without him. I need him. We need him.’ Rey sobs, tears rolling down her face.

Leia’s heartbreaks, and she takes a sharp breath, her eyes temporarily scrunching close as they come to a stop. She needs to be strong for Rey right now, and Rey needs to be strong for her baby.

‘Rey. I know this is difficult and scary, and you want Ben with you more than anything. But he’s not here, and this little one isn’t waiting for no man.’ Leia gently places her hand on Rey’s bump.

‘I’m afraid.’ Rey whimpers, sniffling and rubbing her eyes.

‘Oh don’t be afraid. It’ll be okay. I’ll be right there with you.’ Leia smiles making her voice as upbeat as possible as they begin walking again.

o-o-o-o-o

With Rey strapped into the passenger seat of Leia’s car she closes the door and turns on her husband.

‘You go to that prison and you get our son out, you hear. I don’t care what you have to do to get him out, just do it. Even if you have to take his place and serve his last day yourself, get him out and to that hospital before his baby is born or else.’ Leia threatens and Han nods before taking off in the direction of the Falcon.

o-o-o-o-o

‘Okay, you’re four centimeters dilated, and everything is progressing nicely.’ The midwife smiles from the foot of the bed, and Rey lets out a huff.

‘I thought I’d be further along by now.’ She mumbles as Leia strokes her shoulder.

She’s been in labour for nine hours, but after the epidural the pain has eased immensely. Rey looks out of the window, sunrise has been and gone and the world beyond the window looks cold with a threat of snow.

Rey doesn’t notice how Leia looks down at the elegant watch on her wrist and then over at the door before sighing and scowling. Instead Rey finds herself thinking of Ben and her eyes prick with tears. Oh how she desperately wanted him to be there for the birth of their first child. But nothing in their relationship has gone smoothly so far, so why would this.

o-o-o-o-o

Lunchtime has been and gone. Rey managed to slowly eat a fruit bar and a couple of arrowroot biscuits with some water. All morning she’s been sipping on an energy drink to keep her strength up as her labour moved along slowly – she’s now six centimeters dilated and it feels like it will take forever.

Leia gets to her feet and pats Rey’s shoulder, ‘I’m just going to make a phone call.’ She smiles down at the tired looking young woman, who nods in reply.

Leia fishes her cell from her handbag as she leaves to room and stops just outside the door, and scrolls down to Han’s number and presses dial. It rings and rings and rings to no answer and Leia lets out a frustrated scoff.

‘Is everything okay? Are Rey and the baby alright?’ Poe’s voice from behind her makes her jump a little and spin round to find the young man approaching with Finn at his side.

‘Oh everything’s fine, with Rey and the baby. Coming along nicely according to the midwife.’ Leia tells them, but her shoulders sag and her eyes look downcast.

‘Is it something else?’ Finn asks gently as they stop a foot or two away.

Leia sighs, leaning back against the wall and gripping her cell in her hand as she closes her eyes for a moment. 

‘I sent Han to get Ben right before we left the apartment. That was hours ago, but I’ve heard nothing for ages. I know Han had to wait until normal hours but that was six hours ago, they should be here by now, or Han should have at least called. Rey really wants Ben here, and I know he’ll be devastated to miss this.’ Leia explains to her employees with a sorrowful sigh and tired eyes.

Poe and Finn look at one another; they don’t know what to say. What can they say?

o-o-o-o-o

‘Okay Rey, it’s time to start pushing.’ The midwife smiles from between Rey’s legs.

Rey’s eyes widen as she looks over at Leia who smiles encouragingly, giving Rey’s hand a squeeze. Rey looks over at the window, the sky is now dark again and her heart drops a little. They’re so close to Christmas Eve and Ben’s release, but he won’t be out in time to see their baby be born.

o-o-o-o-o

Rey’s growling, her teeth clenched and bared as she pushes, her hands gripping the backs of her thighs and her eyes are scrunched close. The blood is pumping in her ears and she can vaguely hear words of encouragement from the midwife and Leia. And the sound of the door opening and someone calling “Sir, you can’t go in there.”

‘Rey!’ Ben gasps from the doorway, ignoring the nurse telling him to leave.

Rey’s eyes fire open and she stops pushing and sags back against the cushions, panting heavily. But a delighted smile spreads across her face as Ben hurries to her side, Leia steps out of the way a smile on her face and tears in her eyes.

‘You’re here. You’re really here.’ Rey gasps, as she reaches up and brushes her hand over his face, tears trickling from her eyes.

‘I’m here. Yes I’m really here. I wasn’t go to miss this for anything in the entire world.’ He smiles; pressing kisses to her fingertips in between words before pressing a kiss to her sweaty forehead.

Ben gives her hand a squeeze before Rey is gripped with the urge to push. And push she does.

For the next couple of hours Rey holds Ben’s hand tightly as she pushes their baby into the world, but he doesn’t complain. He’s just so relieved to be there, witnessing this monumental moment in his life.

His father had been locked in negotiations for hours with the Prison Warden and even the Secretary of Justice, and in the end his impassioned plea for his son to be released twelve hours early, so he could be at his child’s birth, won out. That; and his resignation as Director of the Federal Intelligence Agency.

But as Han and Leia wait outside the delivery suite with Luke, Chewie, Poe and Finn he knows it was worth it. He’s not getting any younger and would sooner spend quality time with his family before it’s too late. Especially as he’s about to become a grandfather.

o-o-o-o-o

‘A final big push Rey. You can do this.’ The midwife states and Rey pants with exhaustion.

‘Come on buttercup. You’ve got this.’ Ben nods, grinning encouragingly as Rey takes a deep breath and their baby is almost born.

Rey goes for it, teeth clenched and eyes tightly closed as she cries out with her exertion to give birth to their baby. She leans forward a little, her fingernails digging into Ben’s hand, and she gives the push everything she has.

‘You did it. Rey. You did it.’ The midwife smiles as she tends to their baby.

Rey sags back against the bed, gasping for breath and eyes closed, but there’s a grin on her face, at the sound of her baby crying. Ben’s eyes are full of tears as he watches the midwife stand up with a tiny bundle wrapped in a white blanket in her hands.

‘Congratulations you have a son.’ The midwife smiles as she steps toward them and Rey lifts her head, tears streaming down her face.

Ben shuffles a little out of the way as the midwife places their son into Rey’s arms. He doesn’t even fight back the tears as he gazes adoringly down at Rey and their baby.

‘Hello little one.’ Rey whispers, her finger carefully stroking her son’s cheek.

‘We have a son.’ Ben croaks as Rey looks up at him, a beaming smile on her tired and red face and she nods.

‘Our son.’ She chokes.

o-o-o-o-o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)


	11. Chapter 11

o-o-o-o-o

April

‘You know what day it is tomorrow?’ Rey asks carefully as she folds Jacen’s baby-grows and places them into a bag.

‘Ummmm Saturday.’ Ben quips from his position lounging on the bed, their four-month-old son lying next to him and giggling when Ben tickles his belly.

Rey scoffs, tilting her head to the side and raising an eyebrow in question.

‘Yes I know what day it is tomorrow. But I’d sooner not be reminded of it thanks all the same.’ Ben scoffs, leaning over and blowing a raspberry on Jacen’s belly and the little boy squirms with delight.

‘Ben-‘

‘Rey, I don’t want to hear it okay. I know what day it is, and I’d sooner forget about it. So drop it.’ Ben snaps as he hauls himself off the bed and leaves the room.

Rey shakes her head, looking down at Jacen still lying on the bed. She steps round and sits on the edge, leaning over and gently running her finger over Jacen’s belly.

‘It’s a year ago since your daddy went to prison tomorrow. He doesn’t like to talk about it. Actually he never talks about it. But you don’t have to worry little one. You never have to worry about it, okay?’ She coos, eyes fixed on her little boy and his mane of dark hair and hazel eyes.

o-o-o-o-o

‘Are you sure about taking him for the night?’ Rey questions as Leia takes Jacen from Rey’s arms, smiling adoringly down at her grandson.

‘Of course we’re sure. We love having him here. We love spending time with him, don’t we my gorgeous boy?’ Leia mutters as she presses a kiss to Jacen’s cheek.

‘Now you go and have a night to yourselves. And try not to worry about this one. He’s in safe hands.’ Leia smiles at Jacen and then Rey, whose brows are slightly furrowed with worry.

‘Come on. He’ll be fine. He’s only a phone call and a short drive away.’ Ben murmurs as he steps in next to his fiancée, running his hand down her back and Rey nods as he presses a kiss to the top of her head. The earlier conflict long forgotten.

‘Call us if there’s anything, okay?’ Rey says forcefully, her eyes on her son as she steps forward and presses a long kiss to Jacen’s head.

‘Of course.’ Leia smiles assuredly.

‘Night night little one. Sleep well and be good for your Nana and Pops.’ Rey whispers to her baby, and Leia smiles at the loving and tender words.

Ben strokes Jacen’s back and kisses his head, before smiling at his parents and guiding Rey out of the apartment.

Once they’re down on the street he stops, watches Rey fret and sighs.

‘He’ll be okay.’

‘I know. I-I….’

‘Rey look at me.’ Ben commands and Rey turns, slowly looking up at his face.

Ben places his hands on her shoulders, his eyes brimming with love and happiness.

‘I understand, okay. I get it. I want to be with him all the time after everything. I already missed so much that I don’t want to miss anything at all. But we have to take some time for us as well. There has to be a balance.’ Ben points out and Rey sighs, before sinking against his chest, arms wrapping around his waist.

‘I know. It’s just difficult.’ She mumbles against his chest as Ben rests his chin on top of her head.

‘I guess the first time is always the most difficult. I suppose it’ll get easier.’ He mutters quietly and Rey closes her eyes, knowing that he’s right as Ben presses a kiss to the top of her head.

‘Come on. The pizza and wine isn’t going to eat and drink itself.’ Ben smiles down at her as he pulls back from her grip.

Rey offers him a shy smile as he leans down and presses a soft kiss to her lips.

o-o-o-o-o

With the pizza eaten, and the wine drunk Rey is feeling a tiny bit better about spending the night apart from Jacen. She’s even feeling a little tipsy.

Rey adjusts on the couch, pulling her legs up and leaning toward Ben. He turns his head, his eyes watching her carefully with a slight smile on his lips.

‘I love you.’ She whispers, resting her chin on his shoulder.

‘I love you more.’ He whispers in reply, his eyes studying her face and seeing her eyes glazing over.

Rey presses a kiss to his lips, it’s almost chaste. But then it builds with desire and hunger as she shifts to straddle him. It’s been exactly one year since they last had sex.

Since Rey gave birth to Jacen she’s not wanted to be intimate other than kisses and cuddles; and while Ben understood she could tell he wanted to take things further, but he refused to pressure her.

Ben’s hands grip her hips as she gently grinds against him, her breath fluttering out of her chest and against his lips. Her hands run up his face and into his hair as he kisses her with a year’s worth of fire and passion, hunger and desire.

He lets his hands wander up her back, pulling at her jumper, peeling It off and throwing it over the back of the couch, leaving her in her yellow summer dress with her white nursing bra beneath.

Rey whines softly as he leans forward, kissing down her neck and along her collarbone and chest while gently squeezing her breasts. She grips his hands and guides them beneath her dress.

‘You’re so fucking beautiful and sexy.’ Ben purrs as he pushes her dress up in order to see her white cotton panties, and Rey lets out a startled giggle.

‘No I'm not.’ She mumbles, looking embarrassed and Ben’s hands pause on her thighs.

‘Rey. You’re always sexy. Always.’ He tells her, his eyes locked with hers and Rey bites her lips together.

Together they undo his belt and fly. Ben lifts his hips and Rey yanks his jeans and underwear down, over his butt but leaves them half way down his thighs. She’s feeling too impatient and too turned on to strip him properly.

Rey shuffles forward, hands gripping Ben’s shoulders as he pushes her panties aside. Rey lets out long breath as she sinks down onto his erection. Ben lets out a strangled groan before kissing Rey hungrily.

After a moment, allowing herself time to adjust to the feel of Ben inside of her again, Rey rises up before easing back down. She’s more than missed this, the feel of him, filling her, stretching her. Completing her.

‘Oh fuck Rey.’ Ben hisses, pulling his lips from hers and gazing up at her through his glazed eyes as she moves, his hands holding her hips, but she’s dictating the pace and depth.

‘I’m going to……’ Ben trails off, silenced by Rey’s lips as she crashes their mouths together, her hips quickening as her own release gets ever closer.

It was never going to last very long, not after all this time.

Ben gets there first with a cry of her name, spilling inside of her and his head falling back against the back of the couch. Rey rocks her hips quickly needing to get there too before it’s too late. She grits her teeth as her hand slides beneath her panties and she begins to furiously rub her clit.

‘Fuck, fuck. Fuck Ben. Oh, oh. Oh fuck.’ She gasps as she orgasms, her legs turning to jelly as she sags against him.

A short while later Ben slowly runs his hands up and down her back. He loosens the single tie in her half up half down hair and brushes his fingers through it.

‘Sorry. That’s not quite how I wanted that to go.’ He murmurs, looking embarrassed.

Rey huffs, a smile on her face as she moves to looks at him.

‘We have all night and a lot of catching up to do.’ She smiles shyly and a grin spreads across Ben’s face.

o-o-o-o-o

The next morning Rey rubs sleep out of her eyes as the light streams in through the crack in the curtains. Her head is throbbing a little and she scrunches her eyes back shut.

Ben groans next to her. He’s practically wrapped around her, trapping her body with his.

‘We need to get up. We need to get Jacen.’ Rey murmurs, her voice a little horse as she pushes his arm from her waist and sits up.

‘What time is it?’ Ben mumbles, wrapping his arm around her waist and leaning down to press a kiss to her hip.

‘Nearly eight.’ Rey suddenly panics, she’s not seen her son in over twelve hours and her heart begins thudding aggressively in her chest as she shoves Ben away and dives out of bed.

‘Are you okay?’ Ben enquires as he sits up, running a hand through his wild bed hair, yawning and stretching at the same time.

‘Get dressed. We need to get Jacen.’ Rey snaps at him as she grabs some clothes and darts out of the room.

Ben leans over and scoops up his cell – no missed calls and no texts. If there had been a problem with Jacen then his Mother would have let him know. He hears the shower turn on and sighs, before flopping back down on the bed.

o-o-o-o-o

‘Oh come here little one.’ Rey coos happily as she takes Jacen from his Grandmother’s arms in the doorway to Leia’s apartment.

Leia smiles as Rey smoothers her baby boy with kisses as Ben tries to usher her into the hallway form his position on the doorstep.

‘He was as good as gold. Only woke your Father up twice in the night.’ Leia tells Ben as he slowly walks Rey inside and closes the door behind him.

‘He was on feeding duty then?’ Ben snickers as he pauses by Rey and looks down at his son, a beaming smile spreading across his face at the sight of his baby.

‘Feeding, changing, burping, bathing.’ Leia chuckles and Ben’s eyes flit to his Mother.

‘What? He didn’t do much of that with you, so he can do it for his Grandson.’ She shrugs, arms folded over her chest and a smile on her lips.

Ben can’t help but chuckle at his Mother as places his hand on Jacen’s back and brushes his thumb up and down while gazing down at the little one.

‘I missed you so much little one.’ Rey whispers into her son’s ear as Ben presses a hand to the small of her back.

‘May I?’ He asks, and Rey’s brows furrow for a moment, unsure what he’s asking. But then he gestures toward Jacen and it becomes instantly clear – he wants to hold his son.

She smiles softly as together Ben takes hold of Jacen and the baby snuggles into his Father’s chest the moment he’s in his arms. It makes Ben smile with delight and Rey look lovingly at man and child.

Ben presses kisses to Jacen’s head before snatching a fleeting one from Rey as she brushes past her two men and heading for Leia.

‘You look tired. I thought the point of Han and I taking Jacen for the night was to give you some rest.’ Leia states, and there’s a knowing tone in her voice.

Rey blushes and bites her lips together as she looks down at the floor.

‘Yeah, um, well. Yeah.’ She rambles, not making any sense.

‘I hope you were careful. Unless of course you want to give me a Granddaughter.’ Leia quips as she looks from Rey to Ben, a gleeful smile on her lips and knowing mischief in her eyes before disappearing through the door.

Rey looks over at Ben and Jacen and her heart swells with love, affection, pride and for a moment she can see herself heavy with another child. A smile crosses her face just as Ben turns to look at her, his eyes full of such love and adoration and she knows that she wants another baby.

o-o-o-o-o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :D


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to thank everyone who's taken the time to read this fic. It really means a lot :D <3
> 
> This is the end of this story and thereby it's the end of Dangerous Woman too - just thank you all so much for the love and encouragement and I hope that this fluffy end is as satisfying to you all as it is to me :)

o-o-o-o-o

August

Rey peers at herself in the floor length mirror. Her hands are quivering slightly as she brushes them over her middle. She sighs. She’s not pregnant. And she really wants to be. But Ben had said no.

When she told him four months earlier that she wanted to have another baby he said no instantly. It almost broke her heart. She didn’t expect him to reject her idea so easily and without any thought. 

She sobbed, begged and pleaded, but he stood strong and held firm. He didn’t want another child straight away. He wanted them to enjoy the family they already had. He wanted them to enjoy Jacen, to watch him grow and develop. Not having to worry about two babies.

She’d be lying if she said it didn’t test their relationship. It did, it really did. In those moments after rejection she honestly thought about walking away from him, leaving him. But then she remembered that she loved him beyond everything else. More than she’s ever loved anyone in her life. Ben Solo is her everything.

When she’d calmed down she realised that he was right. She is still a student, working her part-time job in a museum gift shop, and looking after their son. It’s all exhausting, but also so rewarding. It’s everything she could desire and wish for. 

Ben is a freelance photographer – the whole scandal of his life had played out in the gossip columns – which Rey had resolutely ignored. And while it was hell having her fiancé be dragged through the mud it did have its benefits. Ben gets good commission for his work from a number of highbrow magazines and newspapers. And sometimes it means that he has overnight trips or overseas shoots. And those are the most difficult, not that she’d tell him, but she’s sure he already knows.

When she tentatively asked Ben when they’d have their second child, he simply replied eventually. Rey knows that he doesn’t want Jacen to be an only child, not like they both were. He wants Jacen to have a sibling or two; he’s just not set on an exact timeframe. Often pointing out that Rey is barely an adult herself, so they've got time. Plenty of it.

A faint knock on the door brings Rey out of her thoughts.

‘Come in.’ She answers and the door creaks open and Leia steps inside.

‘Oh Rey you look beautiful.’ Leia gasps, clutching a hand to her chest as tears well in her eyes as she comes to a stop a foot away from Rey.

Rey feels a tiny pink blush grace her cheeks as she smiles at her nearly Mother-in-Law.

‘Thank you.’ Rey smiles warmly at the petite woman.

‘Are you feeling okay?’ Leia enquires gently and Rey inhales deeply through her nose and nods.

‘Yes. I’m feeling great. A little nervous.’ Rey admits, looking a little sheepish.

‘Oh that’s normal. To be expected really. It shows that what you’re doing is important and means a lot.’ Leia explains, trying to sooth her nerves.

‘It does. It means everything to become Ben’s wife. To make our family whole.’ Rey smiles as she looks over at Leia.

o-o-o-o-o

Rey rests her cheek against her husband’s chest as the opening bars of Jessie Ware’s Wildest Moments begins to play. It’s their first dance as man and wife. And Rey couldn’t be happier as she looks over at a beaming Leia, with Jacen sitting in her lap. Han, Luke, Chewie, Poe and Finn are around the table too, all equally happy for the newly married couple.

‘You really are the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes upon.’ Ben murmurs into her hair and Rey can’t hide her smile, nor does she want to.

‘I love you.’ She smiles, turning her head to look up at him as they sway, his hands on her waist and hers on his shoulders.

‘I love you more.’ He smiles almost shyly.

‘I love you most.’ Rey blushes, seeing his gaze fixed on her and only her.

‘That’s not possible.’ His smile widens and Rey lets out a small giggle.

‘I’d rip the entire universe apart if you asked me to.’ He points out and Rey scoffs softly shaking her head a fraction.

‘I’m being serious. I’d move heaven and hell for you Rey.’ Ben stares at her intently, and she knows he means what he’s saying.

‘I know.’

o-o-o-o-o

TEN YEARS LATER

‘Jacen, don’t let go of her hand, you hear.’ Rey states firmly at her son as two of her children hurry along in front of her.

‘Don’t be too hard on him. He’ll look after her. He’s a good kid.’ Ben says next to her and Rey turns her head to look at her husband.

‘Me? Hard on him? What about you?’ She admonishes, shaking her head.

‘I’m not hard on him. I encourage him. Jacen has so much potential to do amazing and life changing things. He just needs some guidance.’ Ben informs her and Rey rolls her eyes having heard his lecture before.

‘If anything you should have been warning Kira. Trouble always has a way of finding her. Much like her mother.’ Ben teases and Rey huffs looking over at her son and daughter.

Jacen is the spitting image of his father, apart from the ears for which Ben is eternally grateful. He has the same dark hair and piercing and open brown eyes. And he’s tall for his age; he’s going to grow into a strapping young man. But he’s smart too – again like his father. Oh and he’s a mommy’s boy, much to Ben’s dismay.

Kira is all Rey. Petite, light brown hair and hazel eyes. She reminds Rey so much of herself when she was the same age – five. Mischievous, nosy, boisterous, interested in everything, and scared of nothing. The little girl loves to be active, always running around. While Jacen is more guarded when it comes to friends, Kira will make friends with anyone. A social butterfly. And she has her daddy wrapped around her little finger.

Then there’s the little one nestled into her daddy’s chest, gazing wide-eyed at the world around her. One-year-old Daisy. With Rey’s hazel eyes, and Ben’s dark hair, she’s a mix of her parents. Curious, yet cautious. Her little hand balls into fists, Ben’s maroon t-shirt clutched beneath her fingers as she looks around, taking it all in.

‘Just tell me if you get tired and we’ll leave, okay?’ Ben tells Rey and she scoffs, shaking her head.

‘How often do we get to go to a theme park as a family, huh? Let them enjoy themselves. I’ll be fine.’ Rey smiles adoringly at her husband.

‘Yes but-‘

‘No buts. I’ll be fine. This isn’t my first rodeo. I’ve been pregnant before otherwise where did these three come from?’ Rey interrupts to chastise Ben, but in a playful way.

Ben sighs, shaking his head a little.

‘I know. But this is the first time you’ve been pregnant with twins. I just don’t want you overdoing things and exhausting yourself.’ Ben tells her sincerely.

‘Okay, if I get tired I’ll let you know. Alright?’ She smiles, giving his hand a squeeze and he nods, a happy smile spreading across his face.

Ben looks from Daisy, to Jacen and Kira and then his wife. Seeing her free hand resting on her five-months pregnant stomach and she’s smiling to herself. He’s never felt so happy, and it’s all because of his ever-expanding family.

He’d be lost without them.

o-o-o-o-o

THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading :)
> 
> Let me know what you thought :)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading :)
> 
> I own nothing other than my imagination and a love for Star Wars :D
> 
> And yes I named the baby Jacen because I love the name <3


End file.
